The Kardashian Sister-on-Sister Feud Makes a Calculated Comeback
After a glaring lack of conflict in the first two seasons of The Kardashians, the Kim vs. Kourtney blow-up in Season 3 is vintage KUWTK for a reason.
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“My sister used my wedding as a business opportunity,” says Kourtney Kardashian, in that robotic Californian drawl we now instantly associate with reality TV’s First Family. I’m about a minute into the trailer for Season 3 of The Kardashians, which returns to Hulu on May 25. It sounds like Kourtney has fallen out with the Final Boss of poreless Kardashian sisters: Kim. “She’s mad at me?” asks Kim, to which Khloe replies: “Livid,” opening her eyes into a Tyra Banks-style smize to emphasize her elder sister’s rage.
It’s tantalizingly unclear what has happened between the pair, so much that I want to jump through the screen into Kim’s intimidatingly minimalist home and find out precisely what she did wrong. (Was there a wedding-themed SKIMS discount code? Use KRAVIS for 50% off?) As I contemplate the options, Kourtney goes for the mother of soundbites: “People think it’s a misunderstanding. It’s not,” she says, icily. “It’s who she is to her core.” Ouch.
As a day one fan of Keeping Up With the Kardashians, which premiered on E! in 2007 and catapulted this messy family to international stardom, I watched the trailer open-mouthed. Not because this feud between the sisters is particularly juicy—in fact, compared to some of the arguments they’ve had over the years, when they all had different faces, it looks pretty tame. But I was shocked to see footage of them arguing about anything at all. Since the family moved to Hulu, conflict has barely featured on The Kardashians. The sudden reappearance of inter-family beef after such an absence is the Kardashian brand recalibrating itself in front of our eyes to maintain its era-defining fame.
I first discovered the Kardashians as a closeted gay teenager, when my family got a bunch of extra TV channels as part of a new package, including E! Entertainment. Every day after school, I’d pretend to do homework and tune into E! News, which introduced me to a world of micro-celebrities I’d never even heard of, but whose manufactured melodramas I suddenly couldn’t get enough of.
Right from the start, I was obsessed with KUWTK’s iconic fight scenes, like Kim saying “it’s what she deserves” after throwing her mother’s Blackberry across a ski chalet, or Kourtney laughing that “Kim has the funniest crying face” as she sobs uncontrollably on the same trip. In another early episode, Kim charges toward her sisters and begins hitting Khloe with her handbag. “Don’t be so fucking rude!” she shouts in Rob Kardashian’s minuscule dining room, almost smashing half-eaten takeout boxes off his table as she attempts to land a K-O blow with an unsightly accessory she’d never have on her arm now. The constant cycle of conflict and resolution between the sisters was part of what made the Kardashians feel “relatable.” Despite the huge gulf between their lifestyles and most of their fans—especially me, a teen who didn’t even do his own laundry—it allowed savvy marketer Kris Jenner to position her brood as “just like every other family.”
It was a statement which basically said: We’re so fucking famous we don’t even need to fight with each other anymore to get people to tune in.
When Kim famously lost her $75,000 earring in the ocean in Bora Bora and had a hysterical meltdown about it, Kourtney said what everyone watching was thinking: “Kim there’s people that are dying.” This scene was more than a meme: Kim sobbing over an earring that cost more than the average worker’s annual salary marked a turning point, where it became more difficult to portray the Kardashians as “just like us.” Soon, the family got much richer and more famous. There were fights about $10 million weddings—filmed for the accompanying wedding special on E!, of course—and multi-million dollar business deals. Fans stopped tuning in purely for spats between the sisters and their ruthlessly shrewd “momager,” but also to see the “real” story behind the headlines, from Kim and Kanye’s courtship, to Scott Disick and Kourtney’s endless relationship saga and Caitlyn Jenner’s transition. Their show became a place where the family could correct the public record on various controversies—like Kim’s doomed, 72-day marriage to Kris Humphries—with the confessional interviews providing an added level of intimacy.
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