What To Buy A Grinch

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Some people do not care for winter wonderlands, silver bells or "merry" anything. Some people are bitchy and bitter, perpetually pissed-off or generally annoyed. What we have here are gifts for Grinches, Scrooges, the enraged and the ill-tempered.

Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

Perfect for your Avatar-obsessed friend who would rather live on Pandora; your Twihard niece who wants to be a vampire or the tech support guy who hates everybody. Humans suck tee, $18, Think Geek.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

Everyone has an Eeyore in their life. Downtrodden despondents unite and celebrate! And by celebrate, I mean mope. Despair pennant, $4.95, Archie McPhee.

Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

Your pregnant friend has all the onesies and booties she'll ever need, but she doesn't have a book that will scare her to death with terrifying tidbits about eating and screaming. Oh Crap, I'm Having A Baby, $7.99, Blue Q.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

The jerk on your list will enjoy evil misfortune cookies with sayings like, "Your friends don't really like you" and "You will die alone and poorly dressed." Kind of genius to spring these on unsuspecting guests at a dinner party. $9.99, Think Geek.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

For the quick-tempered Ari Gold types: A "rage" cell phone charm that could also attach to a key ring, zipper pull or Kabbalah bracelet. $4, via Etsy.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

Does your sister hate winter? Is she constantly complaining about being cold? How about some Love Vs. Hate mittens. These are custom, so if you prefer Hate/Hate, Life/Sucks or Fuck/You, the creator may be able to oblige. $30, ArtSnack via Etsy.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

A similar concept, with dept owed to Do The Right Thing. Love on the one side, hate on the other. Isn't that always the way? Two-finger ring, $30, Nesahero, via Etsy

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

The boyfriend who travels all the time and is livid about the TSA screenings will appreciate these boxers with the 4th Amendment printed on them in metallic ink ā€” the text is readable by body scanners! $41, Cargo Collective.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

All kinds of frustrated folk can channel irritations with the Avenging Unicorn play set, in which you use one of four interchangeable horns to impale either a mime, a hippie or a business man. Yeah, that's right. STICK IT TO THE MAN! $12.95, Archie McPhee.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

On the other hand, if you're shopping for someone who fucking despises unicorns and rainbows and Taylor Swift, this can of unicorn meat (there's actually a dismembered stuffed animal inside) will make an oddly satisfying gift. Unicorn meat, $12, Think Geek.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

Your favorite curmudgeon can let folks know the deal with this I Hate People cross-stitch. Also available: I Hate Everything. Really. Why hold back? $3, The Purple Hippo via Etsy.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

A nice gift for a bitchy BFF, especially if you fill the canister with Midol or Advil. Engraved What If There Is No PMS? pillbox, $13.20, by Mud Pie.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

Aww, cute! Sometimes malcontents are adorable. Just look at sad panda Taylor Momsen. I Hate You tee, $24, Hot Topic.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

This gum makes a great little gift for a coworker. It's Not PMS It's YOU gum, $1.25 each pack, Blue Q. (Also loving the one which reads Nope, Not Married Yet.)

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

Got a roommate with an attitude issue? This one is for her. Use This Toothbrush And I Will Break Your Arm toothbrush holder, $7.99, Blue Q.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

Here's one for your angry vegan World Wildlife Fund supporting Greenpeace donation-giving homegirl. It's actually a really well-made bag with lots of pockets inside! It just happens to be surly. (And there is a censored version). Angry Little Girls "Shop With A Reusable Bag, Bitch" bag, $25.99, Angry Little Girls.

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Illustration for article titled What To Buy A Grinch

Lastly, a shout-out to foul-mouthed fillies. F*@K!, F*@K!, F*@K! wallet, $15.99, Angry Little Girls.

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Earlier:
Gifts Women Really Want
The Gift Guide For Crafters
Great Gifts Under $10
What To Buy Discerning Gluttons
What To Buy A Pop Culture Junkie
The Nostalgia Gift Guide
What To Buy Your Coworkers
What To Buy Your Favorite Drunk
Gifts For People You Hate

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DISCUSSION

theformerjunebronson-old
TheFormerJuneBronson

Between that toothbrush holder and Sheldon Cooper's threats of suicide, I'm understanding that there are people out there who actually think it's okay to use someone else's toothbrush?!! Sincerely do not get that.