The Modern Girl’s Guide to Going to Prison for Three Weeks

With all of the excitement surrounding Felicity Huffman’s fashionable jail garb and Aunt Becky’s will-she or won’t-she relationship with potential prison time, it’s important to remember that the ongoing college admissions scandal encompasses dozens more  rich and/or famous people. Such is the case of Jane Buckingham. She is a Beverly Hills marketing executive and proud author of The Modern Girl’s Guide series, which hilariously includes titles like 2006’s The Modern Girl’s Guide to Motherhood and 2010’s The Modern Girl’s Guide to Sticky Situations.

According to the Los Angeles Times, Buckingham was sentenced to three weeks in prison on Wednesday after pleading guilty in May. Buckingham admitted to paying $35,000 of an agreed $50,000 sum, made out to a fake charity operated by admission scandal ring leader Rick Singer with the rest to be funded by her ex-husband Marcus Buckingham. In return, Singer’s partner in crime, Harvard grad Mark Riddell, would take the ACT for her son Jack Buckingham. As you may recall, her son is the one with the handwriting that was so awful, it went viral.

In court documents, a transcribed phone call between Buckingham and Singer revealed she told him, “I know this is craziness, I know it is. I need you to get him into USC, and then I need you to cure cancer and [make peace] in the Middle East.” Where’s The Modern Girl’s Guide to Being Fucking Rude?

I’ve never read The Modern Girl’s Guide to Motherhood or any in her series because I am less “modern girl” and more “gelatinous monster who feeds on the souls of the wealthy,” but something tells me she forgot the step where a good parent pays bribes to get their dumb kid into a school they’re not qualified to attend. Also, Buckingham is definitely the inspiration behind Lisa Edelstein’s character Abby McCarthy on the Bravo show Girlfriends’ Guide to Divorce, right? They must bring it back now and dramatize how this chapter plays out. It’s much too juicy to pass up.