Anderson renovated the property on the absolutely delightful HGTV Canada series, Pamela’s Garden of Eden, which sees the actress—and a noticeably handsome crew—transforming it into “the coolest grandma house ever” in a mere eight episodes.

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Apart from a sprawling garden, there are several outdoor seating areas—including a heated porch—fit for reading, writing, and basking in one’s own badassery on wicker furniture, a cabin for guests with sweet floral wallpaper, and a potting shed that’s nicer than my apartment. Oh, and a charming little rope swing, because hey, why not lean all the way into a modern, Canadian take on the Practical Magic home.

While this is the kind of property that could easily lend itself to my Pedro Pascal fantasy—the one where we just hang out, eat cereal in bed, and never have kids—it could just as easily suit the alternate reality where I befriend Pamela Anderson, move into her potting shed, and spend weeks walking around barefoot in loose linen gowns, cooking plant-based meals with ingredients grown in the garden, slurping midnight margaritas, and giggling about all the dudes we don’t talk to anymore. Because what could be more romantic than living a quiet life in a pretty house with a good gal pal? Well, per her own admission, living a quiet life in a pretty house all by yourself.

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Pam, if you change your mind, my cat and I can be move-in ready by EOD.