It’s rude that today is Thursday and not Friday, but I guess what’s nice for the world at large is the fact that Zayn Malik has transitioned from Zaddy to Daddy.
As I’m sure you’ll recall, Zayn and his girlfriend Gigi Hadid announced at some point in the past six months (April? Who was she?) that they were expecting a child. Over the course of these past few months, all that I’ve really seen of these people are a pregnancy photo shoot that Gigi did and that’s about it. But I should’ve known that something was UP and that that baby was about to exit. It was in the universe, portended by the two teens I overheard at the bubble tea shop talking about Zayn, his impending baby, and how they wanted to have children but would wait until they were “financially stable” at 36. Ha ha ha hee hoooo.
Let’s meet Zayn’s baby!!!
God bless this little child, whose name we do not yet know, and god bless her tiny French manicure, which is less evident in the photo her mother Gigi posted, but is still present nonetheless. I don’t want to take bets on what the name will be, but I am hopeful that the Malik-Hadids will choose something a little less esoteric than Grimes’s baby’s name—something with pizazz, but not so much that the name itself becomes the butt of a joke on the internet for like, two weeks. My suggestions, for when Zayn and Gigi take time out of their busy schedules to read this blog: Alice, Louisa, Roberta, Anne, Brunhilde. Thank you, and congratulations! [Us Weekly]
Gather ‘round, for it is time to put on your investigative journalist chapeaux and get to the bottom of this alleged, wildly-unsubstantiated rumor about Paul Mescal, the hot, sad, Irish one from that hot, sad, Irish show, Normal People. If hot, sad, Irish people are not your thing and you have no idea who Paul Mescal is, here’s a photo for reference:
Yesterday it was brought to our attention via a since-deleted tweet that some users with throwaway accounts on Reddit have accused Mescal, a sensitive sweetie with blue eyes, of being a giant homophobe in high school. Some other Irish people have contested this in another thread, posted to the r/ireland channel. The thread that disputes Mescal’s alleged asshole behavior also includes some fun chatter about his da and mam, leading me to believe that Ireland is small enough for everyone to know everyone, like one big village by the sea where there are fishermen sweaters for all and the air smells faintly of heather when the wind blows in from the south.
Anyway, if you happen to have any information on whether or not Paul Mescal is who these anonymous Reddit people say he is, please feel free to email us at email@example.com. Bless! [Reddit]
- Machine Gun Kelly told my king, Howard Stern, that he fell in “love” for the “first time” with Megan Fox. [People]
- Man, I truly don’t care what Khloé Kardashian and Tristan Thompson are doing with themselves, just as long as at least one of them is happy. [Us Weekly]
- Here’s just one photo of Adam Brody, the name-brand version of Penn Badgley, wearing a wetsuit unzipped to his waist. [Just Jared]