The 'Quirky' Version of Tinder Is Here and It's Awful

There’s a new service out there for people who like the convenience of mobile phone dating apps, but are turned off by the shallowness of Tinder. Loveflutter, for “Quirky People and Places,” will help you find matches in your area not through superficial photos (although those are requested, too), but through a superficial 140-character statement meant to sum up how unique you are.

We first wrote about Loveflutter in August of 2013, but back then, it was just a fledgling little dating site that demanded users complete a quiz to determine how quirky and interesting they were before they were allowed to join. But times have changed! Loveflutter has grown up, abandoned the quiz and become a mobile app.

Of the old site, company co-founder David Standen tells The Daily Dot, “We kinda realized who are we to judge how interesting someone is, and we’ve grown up and moved away from that infantile behavior.”

The app is far less judgmental, apparently. “Looks play a role, but it’s not just about that. It’s about whether you have an obscure collection of stamps as well,” Standen says. “Whatever gives you that quirky edge.”

Oh, I get it! It’s a dating app that sequesters insufferable people! This could actually prove very useful if you’re looking for a tool that tells you who to avoid (stamp collectors and those who describe themselves as having a “quirky edge” are at the top of that list).

I downloaded Loveflutter this afternoon in order to poke around (I’m the Veronica Guerin of mobile dating services) and so far have had no matches. This is either because I’m not quirky enough or because my profile looks like this:

(I asked Millionaire Matchmaker Patti Stanger how to spruce it up. She has yet to reply.)

But even though no one is interested in my witch theories, I was still able to check out other people’s profiles and “quirky facts.”

As it turns out, judging people based off a 140-character, carefully crafted statement is no less shallow than judging them off of a photo. “Things blowing in the wind make me uneasy” doesn’t tell me much about you other than the fact that you probably didn’t like American Beauty all that much.

The only “quirky facts” that could actually prove useful in determining whether you might like or want to bone someone is stuff like “I’m a Holocaust denier” (pass), “Diaper fetishist” (pass, but best of luck to you) or “Will inherit a candy factory upon my father’s death” (LET’S PLAN A MURDER). But there’s not a lot of that on Loveflutter. In fact, it’s mostly just filled with people who are too lazy to even come up with a statement for themselves. Their profiles automatically read, “My quirky interesting fact is that I don’t have one!” Oh, well. At least they’re not try-hards.

If you think that Loveflutter is something you might be interested in (and that you’re quirky enough to be a part of it) after all that, well, I admire your optimism and willingness to find love. Best of luck in finding a mate who also likes unique and interesting things like going on “riding a bike” or being “a Persian Jew.”