The Academy Awards Really Don't Want Another Mistake Like That Moonlight Snafu Ever Again

PricewaterhouseCoopers, the accounting firm responsible for some of last year’s most riveting live television at the Academy Awards, has released a thoroughly comprehensive list of ways they will not fuck it up this year.

Page Six reports that following last year’s gaffe, in which LaLa Land was mstakenly announced as the Best Picture winner instead of Moonlight because some schmuck handed Warren Beatty the wrong envelope, PwC has accepted full responsibility and is instituting some new rules.

Celebrity presenters will now confirm that they have the right envelope with a PwC employee before the famous person holding the envelope makes it to the stage—a step that seems so simple to me, a person who routinely double checks if their coffeemaker is on or off before leaving the house, that it’s a wonder that it wasn’t already part of the protocol to begin with.

Further details on this very important procedure from Page Six:

A new formal procedure is in place for when envelopes are handed over. Both the celebrity presenter and a stage manager will confirm that they’ve been given the correct envelope for the category they are about to present. (Last year’s gaffe occurred when the PwC representative accidentally gave presenters the envelope for best actress rather than best picture.)

There will also be a balloting partner from PwC in the control room with the producers during the show, who will have committed the entire list of winners to memory and will also be in charge of yet another set of envelopes containing all the winners, as an extra safety. The people who served as the Envelope Guardians in the wings have been replaced by two other people and most importantly, those people will be forbidden from using cell phones or social media during the ceremony, which seems like a great rule to me.

While this is fine and good for the hardworking people of Hollywood who deserve proper recognition for their achievements, it is slightly unfortunate for the viewers at home who tune into awards shows for gowns, moving speeches, and the occasional zap of energy produced by a mistake of this nature. I pray that Jimmy Kimmel, host of this year’s Academy Awards, does not spin last year’s mistake into an ill-advised sketch that somehow also includes a comment on Me Too, Time’s Up, and Woody Allen!