Halloween’s awesome, but the morning after can be embarrassing as shit. On Friday night everyone was drunk and wearing costumes, but on Saturday morning everything was back to normal and sad princesses rode the train home, wondering why they’d agreed to hook up with a dude who lived three transfers away. Did that happen to you or a loved one?
We know that you, our classy and dignified readers, have a story to tell that’s worse than any tale that the princess to your left can ever dare weave — BTW, if you are the princess at left, please let us know what happened! — and we’d love to hear it. And for those concerned about rules, please note that in this context, walks of shame can include embarrassing moments that may not have been explicitly sexual. You should also tell us about your own walks of shame, not just those of friends and colleagues. Come on, confession is good for the soul!
I will go first with my own experience of walking in shame: On Halloween, I handed out candy dressed as a giant guinea pig. It was adorable and I scared several children (one tiny robot burst into tears at the sight of me) while also enraging my partner because I was not rationing candy well and also giving out the glow sticks I was supposed to be wearing as “welcome” markers like they cost less than a dollar.
After, we decided to go to dinner. Unfortunately, I went in costume, forgetting that the only thing I had underneath was underwear. At some point during dinner, I got hot, stood up and proceeded to disrobe, not realizing that I was showing off the goods to an entire restaurant full of people, none of whom were in costume. We left shortly thereafter and I proceeded to descend into a shame spiral.
Here is a pictorial representation of what it looked like (but also this photo was taken at school, where I was the only instructor who dressed in full costume in my department):
Later that night (after we decided to go to Reno for some reason), we watched an angry woman dressed as Alice in Wonderland being walked out of the Peppermill in handcuffs while calling the cops “motherfucking cock suckers in blue” and crying.
What have you got?
Lead image via Film District; Princess Image via Reddit