Would You Have Sex With Johny Johny Yes Papa?
Meet Papa: a poorly-drawn CGI character and father of Johny in the nightmarish YouTube nursery rhyme series Johny…
We Would
Not every pitch can make it in. Better luck next time!
Would You Have Sex With the Phillie Phanatic?
The Phillie Phanatic, the Philadelphia Phillies’ (baseball) mascot, is six feet, six inches and 300 pounds of “mostly…
Would You Have Sex With a Robot?
If you’re looking for signs that the promised dystopian future is quickly becoming the dystopian now, one iceberg-sized…
Would You Do It With the Fish Man?
As Guillermo del Toro’s The Shape of Water churns through the awards circuit, an unanswered question has been left…
Would You Have Sex to Jared and Ivanka's (Possible) 21-Minute Fuck Playlist?
HuffPost senior reporter Ashley Feinberg has published a recent playlist Ivanka Trump made on Spotify, which is…
Would You Have Sex In The AirBnB Where Trump Was Likely Conceived?
The Queens home where Donald Trump lived for the first four years of his life is available to rent on AirBnB. You can…
WOULD YOU BANG THE MOOCH!?
PICTURE THIS, OKAY? YOU ARE FRIGGIN’ 3 FEET DEEP IN THE MOST GORGEOUS HOT TUB IN MANHASSET, GULPING VINO WITH A…
Would You Have Sex with Billy McFarland, Fyre Festival Bro-in-Chief?
Please: light a candle, lean back, and close your eyes. You are standing on a beach adjacent to a Sandals resort,…
Would You Have Sex With Tim Kaine's Woke Son?
Last weekend, Senator Tim Kaine’s youngest son, Linwood “Woody” Kaine, was pepper sprayed and arrested with five other…
The Real Mr. Darcy Was a Pointy-Chinned Elf
Jane Austen gifted us all with the romantic character of Mr. Darcy, a brooding yet honorable man who is simply…
Would You Have Sex With This Appalled British MP?
As protests mount across the UK in reaction to Trump’s Muslim ban, a petition to prevent Trump from making an official…
Would You Have Sex With the Naked Cowboy?
Times Square hallmark Robert Burck, 46, also known as the Naked Cowboy, was born in Cincinnati, loves Donald Trump,…
Would You Have Sex With Donald Trump if He Looked Like Jason Momoa?
Sometimes, a Would U topic is not the choice of the Would Writer. Sometimes, a Would U topic is the result of a…
Would You Have Sex With Great British Bake-Off Traitor Paul Hollywood?
Out of two beloved judges and two beloved hosts, only judge Paul Hollywood—hyper-masculine, exacting,…
Would You Have Sex With Someone Who Lives in a Crawl Space?
The New York Times Real Estate section has found its latest hapless victim, and it is a 25-year-old Brooklyn resident…
Dispatch From Philadelphia: Would You Have Sex With Tim Kaine?
PHILADELPHIA—I was trailing a herd of dehydrated socialists down Arch Street when it was brought to my attention, via…
Poll: Do You Feel the Same as This Woman Staring at Steph Curry?
Steph Curry and his Golden State Warriors made the Cleveland Cavaliers look like a kiddie league team in Game 2 of the…
Any Interest in Buying This Erotic Eggplant?
A seller on the New Zealand auction site Trade Me is offering an erotic eggplant for sale. As of this morning, the…
Would You Let A Man Drink Your Vagina Beer?
I know, rude. But I only ask because of this Indiegogo campaign, which popped up on the internet on March 24 and…