It’s gotten quite trendy, over the past few years, to be a witch. Lana Del Rey casts spells on the President, movies and TV shows like The Love Witch and American Horror Story have taken witches to snarkier, sexier places, and even Sephora took a cue from Brooklyn magic shops to sell DIY witch kits alongside expensive…

Welcome to Midweek Madness, Jezebel’s weekly tabloid roundup where I read the mags and tell you about the mags. This week, I read the teen mags. Now let me tell you about the mags!

You may have heard that a teenage girl recently brought a batch of cookies to school, that some kids ate them, and the authorities have been alerted that the teen threw her grandfather’s ashes into the mix while baking said cookies. Reader, I don’t buy it.

A new survey  by Ipsos found that teenagers in developing nations are staggeringly more optimistic about their futures than those in developed, western European nations, the Guardian reports. The study, which looked at a variety of factors including access/knowledge of politics, living conditions, women’s rights and…

Here’s a nice thing in a week of bullshit—Malia Obama in a music video for New Dakota’s “Walking On Air,” a band of boys from her college, Harvard.

It turns out constantly telling little girls they can be anything they want in a culture that loves to sexualize them can get pretty confusing!

I’m so sorry to report that Meghan Markle has been robbed—by Harry Styles! Of her 2018 Teen Choice Award, that is. Styles, I hope you’re prepared to be eaten alive by the corgis for this offense against the majesty of the Crown!

Eighth Grade is one of the rare depictions of being a teenager in all its cringe-worthy glory. Acne isn’t covered up, “likes” and “uuuuhs” run wild, and 90% of the cast in the film is glued to their smartphones at all times trying out Snapchat filters. It’s a movie that should definitely be seen by the audience it…

The O.C. premiered on August 5, 2003, a simpler time in which we had flip phones and layered t-shirts and the idiot in the White House didn’t have access to Twitter. Today it turns 15, so if it were a person, it too could learn what I learned as a high-schooler who treated The O.C. as gospel: everything on this show…

Netflix has a movie coming out on August 10 called The Package, and it’s about a group of five teenage friends who go camping in the woods for spring break (okay, sure) and the havoc that ensues. The havoc, in fact, includes one of the teen boys apparently cutting off his own dick in an unfortunate incident involving…

It was 1997. I would come home after school, pin back the heavy blunt-cut bangs hiding a mountain range of zits on my forehead, apply a thick layer of Clearasil that dried in chalky white streaks, and log onto the internet. The modem would beep, whir, and ding like a digital pinball machine and then, after a great…

Think about all the teen crushes you harbored in high school and all the super-secret romantic fantasies that accompanied them, scribbled into your journal for only your eyes to see. Okay, now imagine all those crushes finding out all those top secret fantasies at once. Welp!

The teens are better than us—this much we know. But if you need another reminder, here’s one: students from Parkland’s Marjory Stoneman Douglas High School Drama Club lovingly brought down the house at the Tony Awards on Sunday night with an excellent rendition of the classic Rent song, “Seasons of Love.” There was…

Netflix’s 13 Reasons Why—the controversial teen soap that portrays death by suicide, rape, sexual violence and other various traumas in excruciating, gratuitous detail—has been green-lit for a third season. Why ask why.

Heyyy teens, knock knock, adult here, just checking in on what y’all are up to on the internet, I can come back later.......nevermind it’s cool I’ll just read this Pew Research study, nbd.

Last night, 14-year-old Karthik Nemmani of McKinney, Texas, rocking rectangular glasses and a smooth bowl cut, won the 2018 Scripps National Spelling Bee after correctly spelling the word “koinonia,” meaning “communion.” The runner-up, Naysa Modi, was felled by the arguably much more difficult word “bewusstseinslage,”…

Eons ago, in the year 2008, Miley Cyrus was just about to break away from the Disney Channel show Hannah Montana and embark on a long journey of self-discovery and occasional cultural appropriation. To jumpstart it, she teamed up for a Vanity Fair photoshoot with Annie Leibovitz—one that racked up a lot of…

Across the country, as part of The Sex Ed Sit Out, parents pulled their kids out of school yesterday to protest “graphic, gender-bending sex education.” (As usual, the self-parody absolutely performs itself.) As the protest’s chief organizer, Elizabeth Johnston, told Breitbart, “A few of us moms were disgusted by the…

Can everybody please leave him ALONE????