Real Life Quidditch Sounds Terrible
In the Harry Potter series, nary a quidditch match passes without a broken arm, broken nose, or cluster of dementors…
A Figure Skater Has Been Accused of Purposefully Slashing a Rival's Calf With Her Skate Blade
In an allegedly true tale that recalls the Tonya Harding-Nancy Kerrigan attack during the 1994 Olympic trials 25 years…
Maroon 5 Needs a Friend. Is It You?
Maroon 5 has the misfortune of headlining the Super Bowl halftime show in two months, and like a 6-year-old who just…
Courtney Dauwalter Is Going for an Ultramarathon World Record
Courtney Dauwalter is an incredible athlete. She has run 159.32 miles in 24 hours, breaking the American women’s world…
Miniature Golf Is the Least Relaxing Thing I Do to Relax
Everything is stupid, and so are we. Welcome to Jezebel’s Stupidest Summer Ever, a season-long celebration of our…
Jezspin Asks: What's Your Baseball Walk-Up Song?
The best part about attending a baseball game is eating a hot dog or three and drinking an overpriced beer while…
Can't Help Butt Notice: Olympic Skater Adam Rippon Has Quite the Boot
Figure skater and Olympic medalist Adam Rippon was honored to share his buns of steel to his thousands of Twitter…
Would You Have Sex With the Phillie Phanatic?
The Phillie Phanatic, the Philadelphia Phillies’ (baseball) mascot, is six feet, six inches and 300 pounds of “mostly…
And the Winner of March Madness: Pre-Apocalypse vs. Post-Apocalypse Is...
Well, here we are. The sun is dying, the oceans are boiling, the bees are dead, and the battle between Pre-Apocalypse…
Congratulations, Idiots: March Madness Ends With Indoor Plumbing vs. Unlimited Time Off
The battle of Pre-Apocalypse vs. Post-Apocalypse has come to a head, and you fools have given me a tension headache…
Scholarship Athlete Says She Was Kicked Off Her Volleyball Team for Posting Selfies
University of Cincinnati student Shalom Ifeanyi says she was kicked off her college volleyball team and lost her…
March Madness Final Four: Are the Bees Gonna Take This Thing?
HOLY MAD COW DISEASE, FOLKS, IT’S THE FINAL FOUR! And what a bleak yet engaging ride it has been! We’ve waded through…
March Madness Elite Eight: Dramatic Sex Is Playing to Win
Well hello! We’re back with Jezebel’s March Madness: Pre-Apocalypse vs. Post-Apocalypse, and guess what, things are…
March Madness Sweet Sixteen, Continued: Wellness Takes Her Last Gasp
Shalom and welcome back to Jezebel’s March Madness: Pre-Apocalypse vs. Post-Apocalypse. Our time is drawing to a close,…
March Madness Round Two, Continued: Y'all Seem Really Into Indoor Plumbing
It’s another beautiful day in Jezebel’s March Madness: Pre-Apocalypse vs. Post-Apocalypse, where the competition is…
Tonga's PM Assures That Girls Are Allowed to Play Rugby After Education Minister Says Otherwise
On Friday, the Prime Minister of Tonga, Akilisi Pohiva, contradicted a directive from the nation’s education minister,…
March Madness Round Two: We're Free-Bleeding on Mars
Welcome welcome welcome welcome WELCOME to Round Two of Jezebel’s March Madness: Pre-Apocalypse vs. Post-Apocalypse! So…
March Madness Round One Wraps Up With a Win for Bees and Chopped Salads
Hello again and welcome to day three of Jezebel’s March Madness: Pre-Apocalypse vs. Post-Apocalypse! We’ve got a lot to…
Birth Control and Mad Max Fashion Are Early Contenders as March Madness Continues
We’re in day two of this year’s March Madness: Pre-Apocalypse vs. Post-Apocalypse, and folks, the competition is…