Op-Ed Writer Suggests Orlando's Gay Friendliness Has Caused a Decline in Disney World Admissions

Out of all of the takes commemorating the first anniversary of the Pulse massacre in Orlando, none was as... singular in its vision as that from the Orlando Sentinel called “As Disney reports drop in guests, is Orlando’s post-Pulse embrace of LGBT too tight?” by one C. Britt Beemer. In it, Beemer suggested that a…

Jennifer Lopez & Lin-Manuel Miranda Recorded a Benefit Song For Orlando Victims

Jennifer Lopez’s Instagram flick of Lin-Manuel Miranda last week, while cryptic at the time, made logical sense: both are boricuas from New York City and, now that Miranda’s retiring from Hamilton, he’ll have lots of time to work on rap collaborations and films and plays and getting generally more famous for working…

Resentful Florida Teen Will Seek Senate Reelection After All, and Honestly, Why Do You Guys Even Care, Go Away

“I have only said like 1000 times I will be a private citizen in January,” failed Republican presidential candidate and agitated ninth grader Marco Rubio tweeted approximately one month ago, in response to a Washington Post story that suggested he was unsure about his political future. On Wednesday, the Washington…

Even After the Orlando Shooting, the NRA Won't Change Its Stance on Gun Control

In a move that some sources categorized as “unhinged fearmongering,” the National Rifle Association’s executive vice president Wayne LaPierre not only adamantly stated that the organization would not change its opinion on gun control, but urged American citizens to buy more guns, because terrorists are “on the verge…

Florida Governor/Voldemort Rick Scott: 'The Second Amendment Didn't Kill Anybody'

In an interview with CNN today, Florida Governor Rick Scott—an empty shell of a man so comically villainous that comparisons to Voldemort are unfair to Voldemort—defended Florida’s gun laws. In the interview, Scott was asked about President Obama’s speech where he challenged, “those who defend the easy accessibility…