Superman's Hairy Chest Is Bringing 1950s Sexy Back

Don Draper’s chest to Superman’s chest: High five.

Maybe it’s the time of month when my lady hormones go crazy, or maybe it’s just because I’m a big ol’ gross horndog, but I seriously have no idea whether Man of Steel is a good film or not because I was too busy staring at Henry Cavil’s sexily tufted chest. It was so distracting! I just want to run away to Pacific Northwest with him and let him fight off bears and serial killers* for my love.

Kyle Buchanan and Lindsey Weber delightfully discuss chesty Cavill over at Vulture — here’s Buchanan:

Yeah, it’s funny that the film’s most visible promotional partner is Gilette, since this is a Superman who’s not much for man-scaping. There’s something old-fashioned about Superman’s hairy chest, I think, and that’s appropriate, since Superman is a famously old-fashioned superhero. It reminds me of Don Draper on Mad Men: Would we really think of Don as the paragon of retro manliness if Jon Hamm showed up for each shirtless scene with a fussy shaved chest?

So yeah, I guess time travel me to the 50s, and let’s have a hairy chest party. Or, wait, I guess smooth chests are nice, too?? However, I think my all time favorite look is the half ‘n’ half. Awooga.**

*The two main exports of the Pacific Northwest.
**Imagine the two o’s are eyeballs.