South Park Gets Invaded By Jersey Shore, Real Housewives

Illustration for article titled iSouth Park/i Gets Invaded By iJersey Shore/i, iReal Housewives/i

On last night's episode of South Park, Jersey-based reality stars—like the Real Housewives and Snooki—moved into the Colorado town, wreaking havoc by flipping over tables, starting fights in hair salons, and partying in hot tubs.

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It all started when Stan's new neighbor "Theresa" and her family—including her Ed Hardy-outfitted husband and heavily made-up children—had dinner at the Marsh's house, where Theresa flipped a table after being told her eyes were too far apart, using foul language, like "muff garbage." (Although, as someone who partially grew up in New Jersey, I found that the characters' accents sounded much more New England-y.)




Some of the other Jersey Housewives also made an appearance, like Jacqueline, Danielle, and Caroline (who was getting her face shaved in a salon).




Soon, the town became overrun by Jersey folks, with Stan noting, "It seems like all people from Jersey do is hump and punch each other.

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Illustration for article titled iSouth Park/i Gets Invaded By iJersey Shore/i, iReal Housewives/i
Illustration for article titled iSouth Park/i Gets Invaded By iJersey Shore/i, iReal Housewives/i




It became clear that the U.S. was turning into New Jersey, one state at a time. The town banded together to fight off the tough-talking orange people, eventually enlisting Osama bin Laden to destroy the Jersey migrants with planes. (And then when he was done, they honored him in a ceremony before shooting him in the head.)

But before that, we learned that Kyle's family is originally from Jersey, and that his mom used to be known as "S-Woww Tittybang."

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Illustration for article titled iSouth Park/i Gets Invaded By iJersey Shore/i, iReal Housewives/i
Illustration for article titled iSouth Park/i Gets Invaded By iJersey Shore/i, iReal Housewives/i
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Kyle's roots later came in handy when the Snooki monster—a pickle-eating, cocktail-drinking, slipper-wearing, grunting, smoking troll with a hair poof—began raping Cartman. Kyle's Teen Wolf-esque transformation into a gel-ed up guido was the only thing that could ward off her animalistic compulsion to "smush smush." He punched her in the face, and she scurried away.




You can watch the full episode here.

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DISCUSSION

snacktasticc
Snacktastic Part III: the Return of the Spatula

Kyle definitely sounded like a Bostonian when he imitated a Jersey accent. The rest didn't sound like New Englanders to me.

Overall, man fucking Jersey, ruining us all. Also, they'd never make Real Housewives of Philadelphia, would they? Or Real Housewives of Baltimore, based on the Wire?