Seth Rogen Has Made Me Rethink My Opinions on Facial Hair

Generally speaking, I am of the mind that not every man needs facial hair. Some men have strong jaws that are so strong that it is illegal to hide them under a beard. Others have pillowy lips that look like the handsome Squidward filter on Instagram, and a mustache hides rather than enhances. However, I have seen a photo of Seth Rogen without his beard and his glasses and feel like I have to reconsider my opinions on facial hair, men, and also, Seth Rogen.

For the record, Seth Rogen is a man that the Jezebel staff largely Would. He’s a talented ceramicist, an affable pothead, and in general, seems nice. But over the weekend I saw a photo of Seth Rogen looking like a stranger and now, I feel confused. Rogen is playing Rand Gauthier, the man who stole Pamela Anderson and Tommy Lee’s sex tape, in the forthcoming Hulu series, Pam and Tommy. Here is “Seth Rogen” in costume, ready?

In order to fully embody the spirit and I suppose, the look, of Gauthier, Seth Rogen put in some contacts and lost the beard, and now, I have absolutely no idea who this man is? If I squint, I can see traces of the bearded, affable, Fozzie the Pothead-ass actor and weed entrepreneur that I love so dearly, but what I also see is a man who is, I’m sorry, hot, in a way that I was not expecting. Let’s get a closer look.

Again, I’m sorry, but who is this man? I see a handsome devil with a bad mullet that I am willing to excuse because I know it is part of a costume and not his preferred hair of choice. (Unless, of course, it is, and then Mr. Rogen, if you’re here, and reading this, it can stay.) I have nothing negative or positive to say about the costume he’s wearing, as it resembles what I think men in the outer reaches of Northern Brooklyn wear or did wear when I was still doing things like “going to bars” and “talking to strangers with the hopes of maybe tongue-kissing one of them at said bar.” Now that those days are past me, I don’t know what the children are wearing these days. But, Seth Rogen without a beard and glasses is Hot, whereas Seth Rogen in his usual Seth Rogen drag is just Cute. Get you a man who can do both, as they say, and OK, I did not realize that he was that man.