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Saturday Night Social: Do You Think God Is Listening to Trump's Spiritual Advisor?

Paula White
Paula White
Image: Getty

The last time we checked in on Paula White, the spiritual advisor to Donald Trump, she was pulling out of a speaking engagement at a conference that was promising supernatural protection from the coronavirus. Before that, she was praying that God would terminate all satanic pregnancies, and making a call against both the animal and marine kingdoms. I’ve still yet to learn what either kingdom did to her, but I assume that unless it’s the kingdom of God, Paula is probably going to make a stink about it. I expect she’ll be coming out against Genovia any day now.

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Her war with land and sea aside, Paula is now taking on an even greater force, God himself, and commanding the Lord to stop all this coronavirus nonsense once and for all! “So I declare to you right now, to be Lord over this nation,” she said at the White House on National Day of Prayer earlier this week, “Over the United States of America, and we receive your blessing over any plague, over any economic distress, you will stay the hand of the enemy, according to second Samual chapter twenty-one verse sixteen,” she said before continuing on to basically tell God enough is enough already.

While I am totally down with the sentiment, and I too would very much like God to get rid of covid-19, I am confused as to why she felt the need to clarify for God just exactly what nation she was talking about. Does she think that God isn’t aware of where she was when she was talking to him? Also, I know I may be a bit rusty when it comes to my understanding of religion, but Paula spends most of her speech (prayer?) reminding God about stuff that was written in the bible and about all the times that he helped people out who were in distress before. I think he knows, Paula! Didn’t he like, write the book? Isn’t that the whole thing? Written by man, inspired by God, or something like that. My guess is, if he’s out there, at this point he’s just not listening, and to be honest I don’t think you’re helping!

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What do you think? Is God listening to Paula White?

freelance writer living in San Francisco. Please clap.

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Krispy Porkchops

Shelter Catstravaganza!

So. After being adopted last week, Tiger and Griffin were returned to the shelter on Monday. They just weren’t ready yet. I felt so bad for them. So I gave them extra TLC this week. And it was not without incident.

Tiger seemed okay with me. We had a good session of lullaby therapy. Even Griffin was up for a tummy rub.

Now, study that photo carefully. Consider where I was standing when I took it. Because shortly after this moment, Before I could even process it, Tiger had reached *across* Griffin and smacked me but good just above my eyebrow. I stepeped back in surprise and put my hand to my head. And that’s when I felt the wetness. I took my hand away and found it covered in blood. So I went to the bathroom immediately and washed up. It was just one claw mark and it stopped bleeding quickly. But wow.

My theory was that Tiger thought I was trying to hurt Griffin and was just being protective. I returned and continued my TLC and they were okay for the rest of the visit.

Yesterday, I visited and it went really well. My goal with Tiger is to get her to the point where she’s relaxed enough that she’ll close her eyes. She even turned on her side of her own accord. And she didn’t shake at all.

(pssst. don’t tell anyone, but this morning I paid them a quick visit and Tiger chatted with me. it was like she was watching birds with the jaw quiver, but add in some mewing sounds)

The FeLV kitty room has been a maelstrom of activity now that it has four kitties. There are the greeters.

And then there’s Maximus.

Don’t rush to judge. Turns out, he had diarrhea, but today is Vet Visit Day, so he’s being seen to.

Rusty has his own...way of saying hello.

New addition! Say hello to Stella. STELLAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!

Our other newbie: Charlie Biscuits (I love that name!). He bears an uncanny resemblance to Erle Stanley. Same face, same body shape, same movement patterns.

Elwood wouldn’t stop complaining until I paid him a visit. And as soon as I entered the room, he nose-tapped Charlie Biscuits, went to bed and proceeded to give himself a thorough cleaning.

Freckles is being adopted tomorrow! But who’s gonna help me when my mask falls off?

Now. Erle Stanley. For the first time *ever*, he came off his bed the moment I stepped into the room!

My new goal is to turn him into a lap cat. The closest I’ve gotten is his front paws on my leg. It’s a start!

He luuuuuvs Sundance. This is a full on, deep dive, head butt love tap.

More newcomers, from the same place my Patti came from. Speedy was a bit cautious at first, but warmed up quickly.

Plush was much less friendly. But maybe now that his problem teeth have been extracted, he’ll warm up.

On the home front, the latest Chewy order arrived! Boxes!

If I fits, I sits, iteration #428.

Mocha, my torti, loves to be bundled and wrapped up. Here, she’s fully encased in the furry blanket.

Nighty Night.

Member of the Family Bruce.