Florida Restaurant Bans Ketchup For Customers Over 10 Years Old

Ketchup is, for some inexplicable reason, the second-most popular condiment in America, but that hasn’t stopped one Florida restaurant from straight-up banning it for any customers over the age of 10.

Mad Fresh Bistro in Fort Myers has exercised their right to refuse to serve ketchup, and, unsurprisingly, many people are unhappy about it. Chef Owner Xavier Duclos isn’t backing down, however:

“My burger has got a sauce on it already. There’s no point in adding a sweet sauce on top of that. I think ketchup is edible – on certain things. I’ll give it that much. But it’s just not part of my culinary agenda.”

Don’t even try to ask me what I think. Nope. No way am I taking a side here. Don’t drag me into this fight, which has to be the silliest internet argument since people starting shouting at each other over how to pronounce “gif.”* The only stand I’m taking is over the fact Mad Fresh can’t spell. Witness their official statement:

“We know, we know. People love their ketsup. But honestly, be ready. If you’re over 10 years old, ketsup will NOT be provided. Similarly, salt won’t be making an appearance next to your meal, either. We simply ask that you trust us. We know what we’re doing! Part of the MAD experience is to trust the chef, and not have preconceived notions of what your dish is going to need.”

“Ketsup?!” The fuck is “ketsup?!” I’ve seen “catsup,” even though that’s still fucking wrong, but “ketsup?” Jesus.

By the way, if ranch dressing is actually more popular than ketchup, I’m still right, because ranch dressing isn’t a condiment, it’s corporal punishment in sauce form. Anyway, have fun arguing about this in the comments, I’m staying the hell out of this one.

* It’s “gif” with a hard g, and I don’t give a shit what the guy who created them says. It’s not fucking peanut butter.