America is shitting bricks in anticipation of the second season of psychological experiment gone wrong This Is Us, and NBC knows it. THR reports 30-second spots during the September 26 premiere will set advertisers back $750,000, as the network is expecting huge viewership from legions of fans hungry for more of the show’s now-trademark reveals.
But even though keeping secrets is a crucial element of its massive success—with cast members sadistically teasing out the show’s big surprises week after week—the show’s costars appear to be considerably less interested in biting their tongues when real people are involved.
Mandy Moore—who plays the matriarch who travels through time or something (I don’t watch this fucking thing)—is reportedly engaged to musician Taylor Goldsmith (she definitely has a type) after two years of dating. But the news wasn’t confirmed by Moore or Goldsmith! No, it was confirmed by two people who should know better than to spoil shit.
Wednesday night Entertainment Tonight published a story with the following headline:
EXCLUSIVE: ‘This Is Us’ Stars Chris Sullivan and Jon Huertas Confirm Mandy Moore’s Engagement
Normally I wouldn’t bat an eye at the confirmation of a boring celebrity engagement by two people I don’t care about, but when the leakers—can I call them leakers? [Editor’s note: yes.] —are stars of a show whose secrets are more well-guarded than Popeyes’s spice blend, I get a little miffed.
“I’ve seen the sparkler, but I have not heard the story yet because I have not seen her yet. She just sent out an alert over our family text chain, so I can’t wait to hear about it.”
“She just sent a photo and just wanted us all to know that this just happened, and so then we went on a response spree for about a day and a half. I’m a huge fan of GIF’ing! I GIF the shit out of that text chain, and I feel like it’s appreciated!”
Now, Chris, if someone in that horrific-sounding text chain revealed how Jack dies—or whatever/whoever—would you go blabbing to Entertainment Tonight of all fucking places without checking with the showrunners?! No! You wouldn’t! So show Mandy some respect and let her confirm her own news! Perhaps this frustration is a little misplaced, but no show in history has ever ruffled my delicate feathers to this degree!