Karrueche Tran Is Pretty Excited to Be Done With New Daddy Chris Brown

Karrueche Tran and human rage hemorrhoid Chris Brown are done, and the former girlfriend of Canada’s public enemy #1 is actually pretty okay with the fact that she never has to see or hear from America’s Best Boyfriend ever again.

According to TMZ, Tran was shocked to find out that Brown was the father of a baby and while Brown tried to smooth the situation over (do you think he left her a singing voicemail? I bet he is just the type of dude who would do that, all singing out her name sadly — Karrrruueeeeeccheeeyyeeeaaaaahhhhhyeahyeah — in an attempt to win her back) Tran ignored his calls and went about her life. Now, a source tells the gossip site that Tran isn’t really that upset that her relationship with Brown is over and is “relieved” because it gives her a “clean” and “permanent” out. That is, of course, until the delusional idiots who make up Team Breezy (is that how you spell it? I know I should check that but I don’t feel like giving Brown the time?) get a hold of her. Hopefully they’ll focus on making Brown theirs and rip him to shreds trying to get a piece (Pefume–style) instead of attacking his ex.

Anyway, best of luck to everyone involved in this mess except Chris Brown. He is just the worst. #fairandbalanced. [TMZ]

Same.

Emma Watson will be playing Belle in the new Beauty and the Beast film. Luke Evans will be playing Gaston. Fusion has posted a gallery of his hottest photos. Here is how mature and responsible adults are reacting to this news on the internet:

[Fusion]

Chelsea Handler says she doesn’t have breast implants and then posted topless photos. I’m trying really hard to think of something hilarious to say about this, but I’m finding that I really just don’t care. Does anyone really ask Chelsea Handler about her breasts or is this thing overblown? [People]
Seth Rogen smokes so.much.weed. you guys [Dlisted]
Kim Kardashian wants you to know that having a hairy forehead is not an insurmountable defect…as long as you can afford lasers, waxing and some really good photoshop. [People]
Speaking of The Kardashians, here’s how much money they’re making! Do not click! [Ok!]
Jenelle Evans’ fiance has been charged with domestic violence. Evans was arrested for an unrelated charge last week. Who is watching the goddamn children? Evans and her fiance have been previously arrested together when they tried to “do it in the road.” [Us]
Hall & Oates are suing hipsters over granola, because why the fuck not? What else have they got to do besides appear nightly in my sexual fantasies? [Page Six]
The headline “Ryan Reynolds’ Hot Body Gets Taken Over by Ben Kingsley” is not, unfortunately an advertisement for gay porn. [E!]
Leo and Rihanna are not dating. Someone actually had to release a statement to dispel this rumor, which is very middle school when you think about it. [Lainey Gossip]
Are you team Lisa Rinna or Team Kim Richards? I’m team Everyone On This Show Is Everything That Is Wrong With America Except Yolanda Who I Kind of Love. [Radar]
“Aaron Carter Is Alive With Pleasure”…is a thought I had while falling sleep last night. I just wanted to share.
Angelina Jolie and Brad Pitt are not trying to save their marriage. They are fine. [Gossip Cop]
Scott Eastwood took off his shirt. Pretty worth it. [PopSugar]

Happy Wednesday! I will always love youuuuuu ::shrieks angrily:: (Skip to 2:15, 3:24 but the whole thing is phenomenal!)