Jennifer Aniston Is The Best Jennifer

Jennifer Aniston with Emma Stone. Image via the AP.
Jennifer Aniston with Emma Stone. Image via the AP.

Jennifer Aniston–the Jennifer Aniston who says “holy crap!”–keeps it saucy for this Harper’s Bazaar interview. Like a celebrity tanning naked in the driveway at wine o’clock, she raps with Amy Sedaris (her friend; omg) on communing with the dead, knocking down walls on a whim, and vitamins vitamins vitamins! while dropping the s-bomb with reckless abandon. The water and lotion salesman I knew last spring is dead. This is a loose cannon I want to adopt as my quirky woo woo roommate; I might come home to a rubble of plaster and drywall, or a $500 dinner of kale and apple cider vinaigrette. Anything could happen, and every day would be a thrill.


Jennifer Aniston on crap:

When Justin proposed he put that freaking ring on my finger, and I was like, “Holy crap, now I’m gonna have to get manicures.” [Laughs]

Jennifer Aniston on how watching television is like puking in a fun way:

It’s sad to see the filmmaker’s and everyone’s hard work diminished down to a computer screen. But it is fun to sit in bed and binge-watch. You can just dive through them like an eating disorder.

Jennifer Aniston on demolishing walls:

You should have seen Justin. We walked in one day after they’d been doing the demo, and he was like, “Holy sh-t. What are we doing?” And I was like, “We’re redoing the house, babe. We gotta take the wall down to put up a nicer one.”


Apropos of nothing, Amy Sedaris asks her if she “ever had to de-spook a house.” Why, it’s funny she should ask!

One of the first houses I rented was in Laurel Canyon, and things would literally fall off the shelves, the televisions and stereo system would all of a sudden blast, and the coffeemaker would start making coffee. My roommate at the time, who talked to dead people, if that doesn’t sound too crazy, did a little ceremony, and that freaked me out. I was new to Los Angeles and the spirit, past lives, New Age thing. And now every house I go to, I have a healer or a medium come through. This makes me sound like an absolute insane human being. [Laughs]


Jennifer Aniston laughs. She laughs like an absolute insane human being, and I love her.

Mel B’s (Scary Spice’s) ex-husband sounds like an asshole. Not only has he dragged her daughter and Eddie Murphy into the divorce proceedings, but he’s now bringing a sex tape into it, the Sun reports, meaning that their kids will be exposed to it. She also claimed that he abused her and controlled her $54 million fortune. Good to know: don’t marry Stephen Belafonte.


  • The other Jennifer, carefully concocted free spirit, is on the press tour again. Get ready for even more gratuitous Jennifer details, courtesy of Jennifer. [Daily Mail]
  • Jennifer Garner is selling baby food like you know she would. [Celebitchy]
  • According to Inquisitr, several employees of Jessica Biel’s restaurant “Au Fudge” are suing for half a million dollars which they’re alleging they never received. [Inquisitr]
  • Demi Lovato “loves who she loves” but she doesn’t want to put a label on it. [People]
  • Angelina Jolie explains her tattoos, but they’re disappointingly bland Buddhist mantras and Arabic scripts. [Daily Mail]

Staff reporter, Gizmodo. wkimball @ gizmodo


Olivia Pope's Wine Glass

Famous Jennifers as ranked by me:

1.) Lopez

2.) Coolidge

3.) Beals

4.) Aniston

5.) Connolly

6.) Lawrence

7.) Garner

8.) Love Hewitt just because

9.) Hudson

10.) Garth, because I have a backlog of 90210 questions to ask.

(Highly scientific study based on who I would like to day drink with the most.)