On December 23, 2015, Santa Claus brought the world an early Christmas gift in the form of Teresa Giudice’s release from federal prison. After nearly a year behind bars, Teresa is a free woman again and she’s letting the world know.

It’s normal to expect anyone who basically lost a year of their life to make up for lost time. What I didn’t expect was for Teresa to hit the ground running so quickly, which was stupid because of course that was going to happen.

If you thought this Real Housewife was going to take a few months to breathe, acclimate again to her surroundings and reflect on the profundity of the experience she had just gone through, you are a fool. Not only are we talking about a woman who treats fame like a life source, she is also someone who has bills to pay. They’re not just giving out coordinating fur coats in four different children’s sizes. (They are, however, giving out a Lexus here and there.)

Teresa’s grand reentry into society was stifled somewhat by 44 days of house arrest. She still managed to attend the opening of her sister-in-law’s boutique, envy by Melissa Gorga.


After her house arrest ended on February 5, Teresa spread her wings and floated over across the river to New York City on February 9, where the bookers at Good Morning America earned their paychecks by landing her first post-prison interview.

The exclusive sit-down coincided with the release of her new memoir, Turning the Tables: From Housewife to Inmate and Back Again, which Teresa and her new writing partner either wrote very, very quickly or decided that there was no additional insight to be gained from waiting a little while.


She sadly narrowly missed landing the cover of People, but Teresa had a strong showing anyway by giving the magazine her print exclusive.

Not wanting to waste an outfit, after GMA Teresa skipped on over to the SiriusXM studios for another gabfest.


Again, remaining nothing if not efficient, Teresa stopped by Access Hollywood for another interview and the same outfit.


Somehow she also squeezed in a chat with Extra....

And US Weekly. Way to get the maximize usage out of an outfit, girl!


Relatedly, if you have not yet seen the pictures of Teresa and her prison squad I highly recommend you take a minute to do so.

She switched things up again for a stop at E! News to repeat the same information about the time she spent incarcerated over and over and morbidly spin her survival techniques behind bars as cute diet and beauty secrets.


That evening, she changed again for a Watch What Happens Live! appearance because homegirl’s gotta keep Andy Cohen happy if life is going to get back to normal.


On February 10 it was time for her a book signing event in New Jersey attended by Teresa’s onscreen nemesis, Jacqueline Laurita and oh, by the way, they’re friends again?

An expert of staying in the public eye, Teresa knows that you can find a promotional opportunity almost anywhere. On February 11 she attended a fashion week event with a whole gang of family members


And lest you forget, all of this is being documented for the seventh season of the Real Housewives of New Jersey.

After going to prison for bank fraud and tax evasion, Teresa admitted to People that she would like to make $40 million this year, meaning girlfriend’s got to sell a lot of books. With her husband scheduled to begin his 41-month sentence in March, he’s not going to be much help, which, as history has shown, is probably for the best.


So keep on pushing, Teresa. Keep on pushing.

Contact the author at kara.brown@jezebel.com .

Images via Instagram/Getty.