DIY Casting of the Next Celebrity Apprentice: 10 Nutty Dream Teams

By Tracie Egan Morrissey  |  August 26, 2013 | 7:50pm
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NBC has not listed Celebrity Apprentice on its 2013 – 2014 schedule because the show has not officially been picked up for another season. According to network executives at the TCA press tour last month, it’s because they are having difficulty with casting. But seriously, how hard can it be? We came up with 10 different casts of 14 contestants that we find very realistic.

Execs at NBC said they are waiting for a “restocking of the celebrity pond.” But as far as we can tell, there are plenty of fish in the sea. Using different variations of what we consider a winning formula (athlete, country singer, recording artist, reality star, babe, Academy Award nominee, somebody with a DUI, and a “get”), we cast 10 seasons worth of the show.

Can’t you just see Tracee Ellis Ross and Blair Underwood playing a married couple in a refrigerator commercial challenge? Or Rosie Pérez’s teammates not letting her do a radio spot because they figured she’d be difficult to understand, only to get in trouble with Trump in the boardroom because she has the most recognizable voice? Can’t you practically hear Trump commending the courage of Stacey Dash’s conservative convictions or empathizing with Tracy Pollan over her husband Michael J. Fox’s Parkinson’s, telling her it’s “tough stuff”?

Anita Baker – Grammy-winning singer-songwriter
Christie Brinkley – Model, actress, and activist
Lisa Ling – Journalist and television host
Pat Riley – Legendary NBA coach, player, and executive
Big Boi – Rapper, producer, actor, and one-half of the Grammy-winning duo OutKast
Tatum O’Neal – Academy Award Winning actress and author
Richie Sambora – Rockstar guitarist for Bon Jovi
Jackie Collins – Bestselling novelist
Tiki Barber – NFL running back, author, television personality, and radio host
Patti Lupone – Renowned star of stage and screen
Chris Elliott – Actor, comedian, and writer
Kate Upton – Sports Illustrated Swimsuit Issue cover model
Ian Ziering – Beverly Hills, 90210 star
Shaun White – Two-time Olympic gold medalist

Sebastian Bach – Heavy metal singer, television actor, and Broadway star
Keith Hernandez – Two-time World Series Champion
Tara Conner – Miss USA
Bobby Brown – R&B sensation and all-around bad boy
Jackée – Actress and television personality
Garth Brooks – Country music megastar
Vicki Gunvulson – America’s first Real Housewife
Alfonso Ribeiro – actor, television director, dancer, game show host, and comedian
Carrot Top – Las Vegas headlining comedian
Rita Rudner – Comedienne, actress, and author
Pamela Anderson – Model, actress, author, and activist
Tim Gunn – Fashion consultant and television personality
Tara Reid – Model, actress, and international jetsetter
Aretha Franklin – Living legend

Connie Chung – Celebrated television news anchor
Taboo – Singer, actor, rapper, and member of the hit group the Black Eyed Peas
Elizabeth Berkley – Actress, activist, and advocate
Rob Thomas – Recording artist, songwriter, and frontman for Matchbox Twenty
Danny DeVito – Movie star, comedian, and filmmaker
Tracee Ellis Ross – Actress descended from Motown royalty
Susan Powter – Nutritionist, personal trainer, author, and entrepreneur
Alex Winter – Filmmaker and star of Bill & Ted’s Excellent Adventure
Brian Wilson – Bad boy of Major League Baseball
Blair Underwood – Film, stage, and television actor and director
Lil’ Kim – Trailblazing female rapper
Jeff Ross – Insult-comic, actor, director, and author
Rosie Pérez – Actress, choreographer, director, and community activist
Bar Refaeli – Internationally-known supermodel

Ted Nugent – Rockstar, author, and political activist
Mike Piazza – 12-time MLB All Star
Cybil Shepherd – Actress, singer, author, and activist
Wendy Williams – Talk show host, author, entrepreneur, and queen of all media
Elaine Stritch – Legend of stage and screen
Tempestt Bledsoe – Actress, television personality, and grown-up Cosby kid
Mark Consuelos – Television and film actor
Keith Olbermann – Controversial politicl and sports commentator
Stacey Dash – Actress, business woman, and political activist
Martina McBride – The Celine Dion of country music
Patrick Duffy – Star of Dallas
Robert Townsend – Actor, comedian, filmmaker, and writer
Jennie Garth – Actress, director, and strong single mom
Kris Humphries – NBA forward whose personal life was headline news

Martina Navratilova – Winner of 18 Grand Slam singles titles
Mike “The Miz” Mizanin – Reality star turned WWE Champion
Mary J. Blige – The Queen of Hip-Hop Soul
Haylie Duff – Actress, singer-songwriter, and food blogger
Eddie Cibrian – Actor and ladies’ man
Claire Sinclair – Playboy Playmate of the Year, 2011
Perez Hilton – Gossip blogger and television personality
Glenn Beck – Conservative media personality, author, and entrepreneur
Phil Robertson – Patriarch star of Duck Dynasty
David Alan Grier – Actor and comedian
Norm MacDonald – Stand-up comedian, writer, producer and actor
Vanessa Williams – Singer, actress, producer, and first African American Miss America
Judy Tenuta – Actress, comedienne, author, and accordianist
Gretchen Wilson – The bad girl of country music

Kirstie Alley – Actress, author, and entrepreneur
Jack Wagner – Famed soap star
Colin Quinn – Brooklyn-born comedian
Jackie Chan – International action star, stunt man, author, and singer
Downtown Julie Brown – Television personality
Serena Williams -One of the greatest tennis players of all time
Ricky Martin – Pop icon
Oksana Baiul – World champion figure skater
David Copperfield – Master illusionist ranked by Forbes as the most successful magician in history
Dennis Miller – Comedian, political commentator, and media personality
Ryan Lochte – 11-time Olympic medalist
Jewel – Singer-songwriter, actress, and poet
Shelley Duvall – Film and television actress
Giuliana Rancic – Entertainment journalist, television host, and entrepreneur

Danny Bonaduce – Radio and television personality and former child star
Jami Gertz – Star of iconic ’80s teen movies
Talia Shire – Movie star and matriarch of one of Hollywood’s royal families
Tim Conway – Emmy Award-winning actor and comedian
Joey Lawrence – Actor, recording artist, and television host
Lacey Chabert – Film and television actress
Steve-O – America’s favorite Jackass
Tyson Beckford – Fashion model, actor, and television host
Patti LaBelle – Music industry great
George Lopez – Comedian, actor, and talk show host
Kyle Richards – Real Housewife of Beverly Hills
DMX – Triple platinum-selling rapper
Gabby Douglas – Olympic gold medalist gymnast
Cindy Crawford – Supermodel and businesswoman

Nathan Lane – Two-time Tony and Emmy Award-winning American actor of stage, screen, and television
Alan Jackson – Country music star
Patrick Ewing – NBA Hall of Fame basketball star
Tony Hawk – Pioneer of professional skateboarding and philanthropist
Holly Madison – Model, showgirl, and telvision personality
Jay Mohr – Actor, stand-up comedian, and radio host
Paula Poundstone – Comedian
Elisabeth Shue – Oscar-nominated actress
Larry King – Broadcasting legend
Ashley Tisdale – Actress and recording artist
Vivica A. Fox – Actress and producer
Tracy Pollan – Actress and activist
Christina Saralegui – Cuban-American journalist, talk show host, and entrepreneur
Bow Wow – Rapper, actor, and television host

Charles Dutton – Star of Roc
Tommy Lee – Superstar drumer of Mötley Crüe
Geraldo Rivera – America’s Correspondant
David Faustino – Actor, rapper, and nightclub owner
Michael McKean – Funny man, actor, and musician
Bruce Vilanch – Comedy writer and television personality
Andrea Martin – Actress and comedienne
Billy Ray Cyrus – Country music singer, songwriter, actor, and philanthropist
Robin Quivers – Radio personality, author, and Howard Stern’s right-hand woman
Regina King – Film and television actress
Judith Light – Actress and activist
Sandra “Pepa” Denton – Part of the platinum-selling hip-hop trio Salt-N-Pepa
Crystal Renn – Fashion model and author
Daisy Fuentes – Television host, model, and spokeswoman

Tovah Feldshuh – Renowned actress of stage and screen
Jim J. Bullock – Comedian, stage, television, and film actor
Fred Durst – Frontman for Limp Bizkit
Tony Danza – Actor and People’s Choice Award winner
Joe Jonas – Musician, singer-songwriter, and actor
Herman Cain – Businessman, author, radio host, and former presidential candidate
Mark Messier – Hockey Hall of Famer
J.B. Smoove – Actor, writer, and comedian
Joan Jett – Iconic rockstar
Kathleen Turner – Academy Award nominee
Joanna Lumley – Actress, author, and former model
Vanessa Minnillo – Television personality
Sara Underwood – Playboy Playmate of the Year, 2007
Iman – Model, actress, and entrepreneur

 
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