Daenerys Must Now Murder Her Nephew-Lover Jon and Claim the Iron Throne

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Daenerys Must Now Murder Her Nephew-Lover Jon and Claim the Iron Throne
Screenshot:HBO

As George R.R. Martin’s incest and ice dragon program winds its way to an end, there are fewer things standing between Daenerys and the Iron Throne—mostly, the fact that her nephew-lover, Jon Snow, is the rightful heir.

There’s a simple solution: Dany must kill Jon so that she can do what she’s been trying to do forever, which is sit her ass on the Iron Throne and rule the Seven Kingdoms with grace, temerity, and the specific sort of fear inspired by two hungry dragons who love flesh and their mother, in that order. Let this bitch, who has not stopped screaming about her desire to do so, rule these lands.

In a perfect world, Dany and Jon would stop having sex and figure out some way to rule together, though Jon has no interest in ruling and is clearly still fucked up from the fact that he is Aegon Targareyn, the rightful heir to the Iron Throne, and not Jon Snow, a sad sack bastard who has died once already and will certainly, probably die again. Dany has been squawking about the throne since day one, and she deserves it after the sucker punch of learning that she’s been fucking her nephew who is technically the one who “belongs” in the seat, thanks to the arcane laws of Westeros. Feminism has yet to reach the Seven Kingdoms, but putting Dany and her irritating lizard children on that throne and letting her rock would be a good start.

I’d welcome her reign, and as a woman who is tired of Jon Snow moping around in the gloom whining about how he never wanted this life, I’m in full support of Dany fulfilling her destiny as the daughter of the Mad King and murdering Jon. She has wanted to sit on this throne for her entire life. Please, for the love of the Many Faced God, let her have it.

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