Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth
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Sex. Celebrity. Politics. With Teeth

Can Kim and Kanye Just Get Divorced Already?

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At this point in the Kim Kardashian is definitely divorcing Kanye West news cycle, I have a theory that these two are actually already divorced behind the scenes, but are instead dragging this saga out in the press for clout and publicity. I understand that I am complicit in this cycle, but the gossip well occasionally runs dry. Hence this dribble of information about their impending divorce, which is either going to happen soon, or has already happened, or something in between the two.

A new report from People suggests that the reality of the divorce and its coming fallout has now hit Mr. West in full. “He is anxious and very sad,” a source that is probably definitely not Kris Jenner in a blonde wig and big sunglasses, told People. “He knows that the marriage is over, and there’s nothing that can be done right now. He also knows what he is losing in Kim.”

Listen... okay. I know that they’re not going to tell us anything else about the actual divorce because they’ve already said that the dissolution of Kim and Kanye’s marriage is going to feature heavily in the final season of Keeping Up With the Kardashians. Obviously, they’ll save all the good shit for TV. I just wish for my own sanity and then maybe for Kanye’s and everyone else involved, that they try to handle what is clearly a traumatic time for everyone with a modicum of decency, discretion, and respect. This is a big ask! I know! But I’m asking just the same.


Also, from a freakin’ PR standpoint or whatever, it’s much less interesting to me (and the two people reading this who care about the Kardashians) if we are breadcrumbed information about their divorce instead of just getting a big info dump about it on the show. There are other ways to stay in the news, and the Kardashians know all of these tricks intimately. Do those instead! Give us the old razzle-dazzle with le divorce on TV. It’s better that way, I promise. [People]

Very quickly, an update on a couple that I think about more often than I should: Tarek El Moussa and Heather Rae Young, his newer, shinier version of his ex-wife, Christina Haack, who used to be Christina El Moussa and enjoyed a brief stint as Christina Anstead.

Sometime last week, Heather shared with the world that she got the phrase “Yes sir, Mr. El Moussa” tattooed on her ass as a “Valentine’s Day” gift to her soon-to-be-husband. The reason behind this gift is because it’s part of a bit that they do? I guess?

Here’s what she had to say:

“I did it as something special for my fiancé, my future husband,” she said of the tattoo. “I will be Mrs. El Moussa, so this is my name. And it is a special thing that we do around the house: Daddy is the boss, I’m the queen of the house. We do it with the kids.”


“Daddy is the boss, I’m the queen of the house,” gives me more insight into their personal life than I think I wanted or needed. I’m all for anyone doing whatever they need in order to run their house smoothly, but I’m also good on hearing the intimate details of how they do those things. This, to me, is gross. Happy for them, but gross. [People]

  • Malia Obama has a fancy job now. [E! News]
  • Jason Sudeikis has done what most famous men in their 40s do when their relationship ends, which is start dating a blonde model roughly 10 years their junior. [Page Six]