Calling Me Fat Is Insulting, But Not Why You Think

This week I’ve been told—via several internet platforms—that I’m fat. I’m not offended by the insult. I’m offended by the idea that it’s is a surefire way to hurt a woman’s feelings. Can’t you be more creative, internet?

Being told that I’m fat by strangers on the internet is nothing new to me, and while I grappled with it initially, my skin eventually became thicker than whatever’s on my upper arms. After awhile, I learned to ignore such comments, but there’s been a recent influx of them via email, Twitter, and Facebook. I think it might be because I was in a video I posted for the first time in a while. Or maybe it’s because I recently wrote about being annoyed by all the fat jokes that were made of Lisa Lampanelli at David Hasselhoff’s roast. Whatever the reason, this new barrage of attacks on my appearance really irked me, but not in the way they were intended.

My biggest beef with these kind of lowest-common-denominator taunts is that they’re completely lacking in any ingenuity or intelligence. Also, while mocking someone’s weight is meant to be a personal dig, it’s actually impersonal. The “fat chick” thing is so overused and tiresome that it’s really not specific enough to any one person. It’s basically the form letter of insults.

And look, maybe I’m fat and maybe I’m not. The point is: I don’t care. It’s actually taken me nearly my entire life to get to this point of comfort with my body. And, ironically, being told that I’m fat doesn’t hold any weight for me, personally.

What’s upsetting to me is that I can tell that most of the comments are coming from women. (Because what dude gives a shit about women’s arms or would feign worry over the baby I look to be pregnant with?) And that really upsets me because how can we ever be strong if we’re always just going to play on each others’ perceived weaknesses? How are we ever gonna get up if that’s the way we get down?

One person on Twitter told me:

You should stop posting pics and vids of yourself until you lose some weight.

And here’s my answer to that:

So fuck off.