Beyoncé's Leaked Single Will Send You Into an Ass-Shaking Frenzy

Beyoncé just gave birth to a Grown Woman, and she can do whatever she likes.

The song is most likely the lead single on her untitled fifth album, and it’s got a steady Timbaland beat — he produced it, with The-Dream listed as co-writer. Here’s a prediction: Ten seconds and you’ll be shaking that ass.

I’ve listened about a million times so far, and this is the roller coaster Bey has taken me on:

First listen
Thoughts: Ugh, I get it; you’re a grown woman. This is annoying.
Actions: Shaking ass uncontrollably.

Second listen
Thoughts: OK, Queen Bey MIGHT know what she’s doing on this one.
Actions: Entire body shaking uncontrollably.

Third-fifteenth listens
Thoughts: ONE MORE TIME!!
Actions: Dumping boyfriend, putting on my face, heading to the club

Sixteenth-twentieth listens
Thoughts: I’m too old for this shit.
Actions: Laying in bed, ass still shaking uncontrollably, sobbing. Should I go to the hospital?