When news broke last week that noted researcher Aaron Rodgers and his barefoot queen Shailene Woodley had reportedly called quits, it looked like theirs would be the “conscious uncoupling” sort of breakup. No public drama, just “sources close to them” saying polite, dull stuff like, “It was an amicable split,” and “They will remain friendly; there’s no bad blood and no drama.” Now, in an Instagram post, the famed quarterback seemed to confirm that their parting would take the high ground—and also gunned for a spot in the cringey ex-boyfriend hall of fame.
“Thanks for letting me chase after you the first couple months after we met, and finally letting me catch up to you and be a part of your life,” Rodgers wrote in a post dedicated to “#MondayNightGratitude.” “Thanks for always having my back, for the incredible kindness you show me and everyone you meet, and for showing me what unconditional love looks like, I love you and am grateful for you.”
Woodley and Rodgers got together during the pandemic, and announced their plans to marry in February of last year. Thanks to controversy over Rodgers’ vaccination status, it was a pretty eventful engagement. After falsely declaring himself “immunized” before being revealed as an an anti-vaxxer who wanted to fight a deadly virus with Joe Rogan-approved homeopathy, he was found to have violated the NFL’s Covid policy, and was fined $14,650, while his team, the Green Bay Packers, was hit with a $300,000 bill. For a guy raking in more than $33 million a year, it was pretty much the definition of a slap on the wrist. Yet, through it all, Woodley really did have his very incorrect back: She tried to distract from the controversy by telling the world that he’s got a big dick and “the hairiest hands on the fucking planet.”
Judging by his sappy Instagram caption, Rodgers seems to remember the favor. As far as needless public displays go, it’s not “listening to Fix You while filming a shrine to your love” levels of bad, but all that chasing and catching up business feels like fodder for a diary entry, not a very public social media post.
UPDATE: In a radio appearance Tuesday, Rodgers seemed to suggest that maybe he and Woodley hadn’t broken up after all. “When your home life is stable and you have an amazing partner to do life with, it just makes the work life a bonus,” he said during the interview. “I know, for me, it’s been great the last two seasons to have that stability at home.” Either they’ve decided to stay together, or this break up is getting pretty embarrassing.