Wow, Will DJ Ansolo Change His Name to DJ Hansolo If He Is Cast As Han Solo?

Illustration for article titled Wow, Will DJ Ansolo Change His Name to DJ Hansolo If He Is Cast As Han Solo?

It’s been a while since I’ve had to think about my favorite actor/DJ, and thank god, because I’m very easily upset!

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However, there has been big news in Ansel Elgortland: Variety reports that he is one of a dozen actors (others include Miles Teller, Dave Franco, and Scott Eastwood) shortlisted to play Young Han Solo in an as-yet untitled Star Wars spinoff that nobody asked for.

Pew pew pew! Motherfuckers, he is here! Masculinity, nerve, struggling facial hair, the confident, sweaty mien of your 3rd grade secret admirer who first made you feel weird about your body—it’s Ansel Elgort as Han Solo, A.K.A. Han “Ansolo” Solo, A.K.A. DJ HANSOLO HIMSELF, dropping massive beats and defeating haters in a galaxy near you! And it’s fate, because a long time ago, in a fancy NYC borough far far away, Ansel Elgort’s original EDM alter ego was Hanzolo. What a good DJ name, and also, what a coincidence!

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May the rave be with you—in hell!


Contact the author at ellie@jezebel.com.

Image via Getty.

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DISCUSSION

andsmokeit
andsmokeit

these potential baby han solo choices are offensive

Miles Teller (only reasonable choice because he is good at acting like a douche)

Ansel Elgort (read above)

Dave Franco (looks 0% like harrison ford, too close to james franco for comfort)

Jack Reynor (doesn’t exist)

Scott Eastwood (charisma of a week old hambone)

Logan Lerman (polar opposite of a future swashbuckling space smuggler gtfo)

Emory Cohen (doesn’t exist)

Blake Jenner (doesn’t exist)