Mean old boot of a human Jerry Lewis (a legendary comedian who legendarily doesn’t think women are funny, especially if they are crude) for some reason decided to sit down with The Hollywood Reporter for a feature on working nonagenarians, despite obviously not wanting to be bothered. THR’s Andy Lewis calls their chat “a trainwreck.” He elaborates:
I had a bad feeling the about how the conversation with Jerry Lewis was going to go the second I walked into his Vegas house — the interview was scheduled for a few off days in his touring schedule — and saw him watching TV with his headphones on. He looked angry. I already knew Lewis’ reputation for being difficult and acerbic with his audiences and in interviews. And he’s a well-known control freak.
The resulting video of a 90-year-old Lewis spitting out as few words as possible to questions that seem to piss him off before they even escape Andy Lewis’s mouth is the funniest seven minutes I’ve ever seen of Jerry Lewis on screen. Intended or not, this is performance art, and it’s great:
Here is a list of Lewis’s pithy answers that, in my opinion, also functions as a poem:
‘Cause we do it well
Not at all
By working at it
Anyone that’s 90 does
It’s not, it’s the same
Exactly the same
Nope, they’re still the same
Some are younger
Ya tell them you’re playing there and they show up
What do you mean?
When my partner was alive
I’ll show you some material, you’ll know
It was terrific
Get a day job
Yeah, I’m glad you remembered it
Ya never forget
Not at all
Absolutely, we’re planning one now
No, just as hard
If I tell you, you’ll be doing it
Yeah, but nothing we want to talk about
No, not for this
All right, clean it out of here.
Such insight into this man’s soul.