Wow, a 3D Kama Sutra App Now Exists

In one of the most unnecessary yet welcome technological innovations since the wine rack, the Kama Sutra is being adapted into a three dimensional app. The Kama Xcitra, as it is called, utilizes state-of-the-art technology to shed light on some of the illustrations contained in the 2,000 year old manuscript — apparently, the 3D models appear as holograms in front of the user’s smart phone or tablet. I wasn’t aware that this technology existed so, if it’s true, I’m very much okay with this being the way I found out.

The illustration on the publisher’s website (a little NSFW) sums the concept up neatly: a truly moving testament to modernity, it shows a heterosexual couple fornicating while standing on a giant iPad. “Welcome to the future,” they’re probably whispering into each other’s computer-generated mouths.

The models can be rotated and viewed from all angles; Hazel Cushion, the managing director of Xcite Books, the app’s publisher, says that this will help couples with “some of the more challenging positions,” including the intimidating-sounding “Prone Tiger,” “Catherine Wheel” and “Peg.” Clearer, completely rotatable depictions will “finally [solve] the problem of where to put that awkward elbow.” Finally, a solution to that infamous awkward elbow, the scourge of many an experimental sexual encounter.

The Kama Xcitra app, which is free with the purchase of a physical book Kama Xcitra book — so, not really free at all — features 69 positions (well-played, Xcite Books). It also allows users to add a customized soundtrack, officially giving this app the potential to be the subway diversion from hell.