Welcome to Would U?, an academic forum in which I share my gross crush of the week and ask if you, too, would bang that person.

There isn’t much to know about Arby’s CEO Paul Brown, aside from the fact that he is very good-looking and runs a gross company. In fact, there is so little media coverage on Paul Brown, Arby’s CEO, that this leonine, strong-jawed fake meat salesman would have slipped right past the Would U council if not for one intrepid Jezebel staffer, who Googled him after Jon Stewart called him out at yesterday’s taping of The Daily Show.

She remembered seeing him in the queue to get in. “He was very evenly tanned,” she shared.

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Would you have sex with Paul Brown? What if you had to eat an Arby’s sandwich immediately beforehand? An entire Arby’s sandwich, like, for example, the Smokehouse Brisket sandwich Ben Seewald, Duggar Husband, recently posted on Instagram with the hashtags #latesupper and #arbys?

Jezebel managing editor Erin Gloria Ryan, who does not eat red meat, said she would “definitely do it.” So would Jezebel staff writer Bobby Finger. Jezebel reporter Anna Merlan dissented, with a “hard no.” Staff writer Hillary Crosley would have sex with Paul Brown, but only if she could skip the sandwich.

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Where do you stand? Would you devour this piece of meat, and also a Beef ‘n Cheddar Classic?

Last time on Would U?, we asked: Would you have sex with Mark Cuban? 45% of you answered “Yes, you’ve got yourself a deal,” 43% said “That’s a no—I’m out,” and 12% said “I’ll go in on it, but only if another Shark joins me.”


Contact the author at ellie@jezebel.com.

Image via Arby’s Restaurant Group.

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