Photo: Wikimedia Commons (Sanfranman59

Would you give up access to internet, television, smoking, your own children, and pets to live like a haunted lighthouse keeper from the 1800s, all while making a good salary while doing it? Just one woman’s opinion, but yes!

According to SFGate, the historic East Brother Light Station, which was built in 1874 in San Pablo Bay, is looking for a new pair of people to run the lighthouse-turned-bed-and-breakfast for an annual salary of $130,000 (split between the couple). Here’s the job description:

The successful candidates will be a couple, one of whom must possess a Coast Guard commercial boat operator’s license,” the not-for-profit which operates the location wrote in a press release. “They will operate the five-room inn, serving both dinner and breakfast, as well as providing ferry service for guests and all other tasks from chef to maid. High quality culinary experience and capability will be a critical qualification. The inn is open four days a week, and the island is also available for day use and special events. The new keepers will start in mid-April 2019, allowing two weeks for training.

Here are the perks to the job as described in the application (as if we need any more convincing):

Incomparable views; meet a lot of interesting people; one of California’s best-known bed and breakfast inns; hard work but pretty good pay for a young couple (or couple of any age) doing something unique; birds, marine mammals, fresh air, boats; and history. East Brother is a registered California Historic Landmark and is listed on the National Register of Historic Places.

Advertisement

The application specifies that “couple” is a loose term, simply pointing out that the “job requires two persons who must live and work together in close quarters.” I will be applying to the job with the most haunted person I know who I’ve also worked together in close quarters with—my Jezebel colleague Hazel Cills.

Do either of you even have a Coast Guard commercial boat operator’s license, a clearly stated requirement in the job application, you might ask, as you try to undermine my dream. None of your business! Can you swim, you might ask next. None of your goddamn business!!

Advertisement

Please hire us and take our internet away.