Watch out, Glenn Beck. The Republican takeover of the House has anointed John Boehner Speaker, and he's publicly in touch with his feelings. Just like Nancy Pelosi! Oh wait, women in power can't do that.
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Congrats, John Boehner! Feel free to cry with happiness because you're the first white Protestant male to be appointed Speaker of the House.
Oh, wait. I misspoke. What I meant to say was shut up.