White House Unsure How Extremist Pastor Closely Associated With White House Became Involved With Embassy Ceremony

Welcome to the rapture, I guess!

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

• The opening prayer at today’s Jerusalem embassy opening ceremony was given by Evangelical pastor Robert Jeffress, who has called Islam a “false religion” and asserted that everyone except Christians are going to hell. The benediction was delivered by Pastor John Hagee, who believe Hitler was part of God’s plan to herd the Jews back to Israel. Meanwhile, Jared and Ivanka received a blessing from a rabbi who recently called black people “monkeys.” White House Deputy Press Secretary Raj Shah has no idea how these people became involved in the ceremony, he told reporters. How odd for a ceremony like that to plan itself. [BuzzFeed]
• Here’s your semi-regular reminder that Evangelicals believe the expansion of Israel’s boundaries is important because it will trigger the end times. [Washington Post]
• A White House spokesman referred to Gaza as “southern Israel,” which it is not.
• The Israeli Defense Force has now killed 55 protestors in Gaza, with 2,700 wounded, according to Palestinian authorities. The dead include teenagers, journalists, paramedics, and children. [New York Times]
• Chuck Schumer approves. [The Hill]
• There appears to have been a massive water contamination cover-up at the EPA. “States have been pleading with EPA for help, and experts say that contamination is so widespread, the chemicals are found in nearly every water supply that gets tested.” I’m guessing my Brita is not sufficient? [Politico]
• Melania Trump had surgery today for a “benign kidney condition.” The president dropped by for a visit, which I’m sure she found soothing. [CNN]

Here are some tweets the president was allowed to publish:

This has been Barf Bag.