What If US Weekly Covered The Haute & Bothered Premiere

I've always wanted to do one GBU which was all US-style lame, desperate, nonsensical punny one-liners about the duds. Alloy TV's Haute & Bothered Season 2 premiere at Beverly Hills' Thompson Hotel was awful enough to be a good candidate.

Ashley Robertson: Amazing Lace! NOT.

Victoria Hervey: Pink Lady!

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Taryn Manning: Go back to 8 Mile! Tragic kingdom! Your outfit is at a crossroads!

Courtenay Semel: Filthy ripped cattle dive!

Malin Akerman: The heartbreak kid! 27 messes! Couples: retreat!

Devon Aoki: Electric Barbarella! Something About the Way You Look Tonight is making me think Sin City! The leather-shocking tales! (Ok, that last one was all me.)


[Images via Getty.]