What Do Women Want For Valentine's Day?

Valentine's Day is just 8 days away and advertising for the "holiday" has begun in earnest. One of our "faves": the spot at left, which, we suspect, is from the people who brought us Pajama-Grams.

One question: At what age is a female homosapien not reduced to squeals and pouty-pouts upon spotting a stuffed animal? I'm not ragging on toys for adults - I have a plush teddy bear, wombat, Newfoundland, and kookaburra in the corner of my bedroom - I'm just wondering at what age these sorts of stuffed animal-related behaviors die out. (Related question: Do adult females even want a teddy bear for Valentine's Day? And, for that matter, who among us doesn't already have one somewhere?)

Okay, let's break down this ad:

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I appreciate that the mailroom guy in this advertisement - unlike the mailroom guy in this advertisement - is Caucasian. For a commercial devoted to stupid stereotypes about stupid shit, the teddy bear people pushed the envelope with this one.


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Here's the lucky lady. As Sadie would say, this outfit is not office-appropriate. Not only that, but, judging from the young woman in the background, there are entirely too many tacky, colorful knit tops to go around.


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A dick in a box!


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Sourpuss here is so over Account Services...


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...But then! (Question: Is it illegal to perform sex acts on stuffed animals?)


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I'm sensing that there is a subtext of gingism in this advertisement.


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This one could use an acting coach. He takes his sunglasses off of his forehead in order to get a better look.


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My favorite part: The periscoping pates of male-pattern baldness as the busty babes ooh and aah. And the clueless, cool guy in the background.


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Another angle.


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Vermont Teddy Bears are not only made in Vermont (???), their orders are taken by bona fide Green Mountain chat line cuties!


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Gross.


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Double gross.


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For those ladies who don't get a teddy bear next Saturday, just remember this: Would you really want the option of having to choose between cuddling a hirsute George Costanza or Jerry Seinfeld on steroids?












Earlier: PajamaGrams: "The One Gift Guaranteed To Get Women To Take Their Clothes Off!"

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DISCUSSION

Vermont teddy bears are really good Valentines day gifts for CHILDREN. My dad would get them for my sister and I when we were little. We thought they were adorable and loved them and displayed them proudly.

But if a boyfriend tried that now - no way. I will take chocolate though. Cliche maybe, but delicious.