Looking at TikTok for more than three minutes is a surefire way to develop a low-grade case of low self-esteem when it comes to your butt. Between horrible food hack videos and mediocre comedians, my FYP is full of women with impossible proportions doing squats and frog pumps, narrated by listless voiceovers promising a gravity-defying peach emoji, fast. Other videos of the ass genre on Tiktok feature magical, “viral” leggings that purport to make the ass look good enough as to be irresistible to anyone in its vicinity. The squats and the pumps are one thing, but doing work to achieve results is boring. If there’s a simple solution that’s only a click or two away, why not?
A wise man once said of a fictional woman named Ms. Fat Booty that she had an “ass so fat you could see it from the front.” This has been my personal goal since 1999. Would the TikTok leggings deliver? Shannon Melero-Ureña joined me on this journey, to see if we could find out.