We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Alba's Dress

Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress

The odds of our seeing "Little Fockers"? Slim to none, unless we're spectacularly unlucky with in-flights. The chances of gawking at some of the bizarre red-carpet choices? 100%!

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Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress

Yesterday, I accused Natalie Gal of sexyface overload. But I'm starting to think the girl can't help it, Jayne Mansfield-style!


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Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress

Looking at Colin Baiocchi's face, how much do you want to bet that this dapper little gent plays what is politely known as "a handful?"


Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress

And Daisy Tahan! We're guessing this party dress-clad angel gives the hapless Ben Stiller a few comically bad moments...!


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Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress

Teri Polo knows the secret to winter sexiness: just draw something scanty on top of your clothes. Fools 'em every time.


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Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress

It's gotten to the point where nude hose are so rare at premieres that I almost respect Rory Tahari's chutzpah in just going there. (Although I think these may be fishnet.)


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Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress

Modeling the hosiery alternative: Laura Dern.


Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress
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For that "I-just-escaped-from-the-snakepit-and-couldn't-get-my-straitjacket-off" look: Laura Harring.


Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress
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Blythe Danner models something eminently practical that almost no one takes advantage of: the warm evening coat!


Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress
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Grace Hightower is coming as close to wearing a Snuggie on the red carpet as we have seen, and as such, she wins.


Illustration for article titled We Preferred This Red-Carpet Snuggie To Jessica Albas Dress
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You know what Jessica Alba's super-busy flapper dress needed? Some SheRa-esque stripper heels. At least, that must have been someone's thought process, right?



[Images via Getty]

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DISCUSSION

Jessica Alba is cute as a winter snowflake - but oh! Those heels! A major case of scroll down fug.