During a recent appearance on The Kelly Clarkson Show to promote F9, the newest installment in The Fast and The Furious franchise, Vin Diesel said that he was “dying” to do a musical version of the popular movies. That’s right people, we’re talking about creating a movie that would involve both absurdly impractical car stunts and elaborately choreographed musical numbers (that I imagine would center around the theme of Family)!! I know it’s not real, but I’d like to make it clear that I would watch this hypothetical movie on a daily basis.
“Well, I’m dying to do a musical,” Vin Diesel said during the interview. “I was this close to doing Guys and Dolls, with Steven Spielberg, and we ended up not doing that but I’m dying to do a musical.” Apparently, Vin Diesel did theater in high school and inherited his love of musicals from his grandmother.
As a long-time fan of the Fast and the Furious franchise, I am both thrilled and terrified at the prospect of watching these motherfuckers sing as they fly through the air in cars. I also have a number of questions for Mr. Diesel about his vision for the project: Would the music be more Chicago or Cats? Also, what are his feelings on lyrical car-related puns?
To be fair, it’s not QUITE as big of a stretch as you might imagine—Ludacris and Tyrese both gained their initial fame for their musical careers after all, and with the recent addition of Cardi B into what I like to call the Fast and The Furious Cinematic Universe, it’s certainly possible that a very very VERY inventive composer could make something work. (No Lin-Manuel Miranda, I am NOT talking to you.)
Unfortunately, for now Vin Diesel’s dreams of a musical that features multiple high-speed car chases are just that, dreams. It’s probably safer to pin my hopes on the similarly hypothetical crossover with Jurassic World.