Welcome back to Midweek Madness, our long-dormant weekly revue of all the best and the worst but mostly deeply whateverness that tabloid media has to offer us. But first… a passage from Revelations:
I am the Alpha and the Omega. The first and the last. The end and the beginning. Itsa me……Jojoo Siiiiwaaaaaaaaaa………………
Let’s dive in.
People
Has People always been a murder sandwich on fluffy, white celebrity bread? This week’s issue opens with an exclusive photo spread from Good Morning America anchor Lara Spencer’s wedding, a little in-depth look at Chris Pratt’s budding romance with Arnold daughter and apparent author Katherine Schwarzenegger, a cute li’l joint interview with Blake Lively and Anna Kendrick about their new movie together, then suddenly it’s like “NEW SECRETS, UNENDING PAIN: THE WATTS FAMILY MURDERS” and “HORRIFIC MURDER, SHOCKING DEFENSE: DID AN INTERNET MEME LEAD A TEEN TO KILL?” and then we’re back to thoroughly benign content like the best-dressed celebrities of 2018 (Meghan Markle, Cate Blanchett, Lupita Nyong’o…) and fall shopping guides (plaid, hoop earrings, anything yellow…). There’s also a retrospective on why former First Lady Betty Ford was good and an excerpt from Michelle LeClair’s new memoir about leaving the Church of Scientology after falling in love with a woman.
J-14
Asher Angel, Loren Gray
Amandla Stenberg Q&A
Corbyn: Pasta! Yep. That’s all.
The fuck is Hayden Summerall????
Millie Bob’s friend? Sadie Sink.
Blake Gray and fan? They hit the rink.