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BenDeLaCreme’s charisma, uniqueness, nerve, and talent shines as bright as the top of the Chrysler Building. So naturally, we had to sit her down for a chat.

For fans of Rupaul’s Drag Race and its cattier spinoff, Rupaul’s Drag Race All-Stars, watching DeLa throughout the years has been a thrilling journey, culminating with the self-elimination that cracked the faces of almost everyone watching. DeLa’s All Stars run was legendary—challenge after challenge, knocked out of the park—until it ended abruptly with her own name scrawled in Wite-Out on an elimination lipstick.

Where did Ben get the Wite-Out? What’s it like filming a TV show that demands such high levels of artistry, every single episode? Is lip-syncing for one’s life the high-pressure, high-stress nightmare that it appears to be on television? BenDeLa was remarkably candid with us about the rigors of reality television in this very specific medium.

“Everybody’s totally nuts, you don’t have any of your normal contacts in the world,” she said of the way the show is made. “I think a lot of the time when everybody’s like ‘This person acted like this’...it’s like, yeah, well we’re not exactly at our best...We’re all really trying to navigate a lot of various things that the audience at home doesn’t necessarily think about.”

On the curse of reality TV editing and its ability to make a person look good, bad, or just horrid, Ben was pleasingly frank and above all, diplomatic: “Whether we come out looking like an angel or a devil, we’re all actually just like, whole people, and y’all probably have a little bit of a devil or an angel inside you, too.”

DirtCast can be found on Apple Podcasts, Stitcher, Spotify, Google Play, NPR Oneand iHeart Media.

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Thanks to BenDeLaCreme. Our show is produced by Levi Sharpe. Mandana Mofidi is our Executive Director of Audio. Our theme music is by Stuart Wood. This episode was mixed by Jamie Collazzo.