The Girl Scouts cookie queens got themselves into a bit of trouble on Wednesday after sending out a tweet congratulating Amy Coney Barrett on being the fifth woman ever appointed to the Supreme Court. The tweet, which was taken down but still exists in screenshot form on MarketWatch, was replaced with a non-apology tweet thread, reminding cookie lovers that the Girl Scouts are “a nonpolitical, nonpartisan organization. We are neither red nor blue, but Girl Scout GREEN.”
The thread ended with a meek explanation for the wayward tweet: “We are here to uplift girls and women,” Hello blind market feminism my old friend.
Congresswoman Ayanna Pressley, who was not here for the bullshit, quickly made the only obvious point that needed to be made, responding to the original tweet with, “What kind of patch does one earn for uplifting a woman who is the antithesis of justice?”
Celebrities, always at the ready to seize on any moment that can be remotely political, had particularly strong feelings about the political leanings of a cookie baking company that pits children against each other to be sales monsters. Zach Braff, apparently a big cookie guy himself, threatened to Google how to make his own Thin Mints, rushing to cancel a cookie company perhaps to seem cool and aware of politics. What Braff fails to realize is that Thin Mints are disgusting and if he’s going to lead the cancellation charge, he needs to start with his own personal taste in baked goods.
But for every tweet calling the Girl Scouts distasteful for congratulating a woman who will likely play a key roll in limiting reproductive rights for millions of girls and women, who are uplifted by cookies, there you shall find Megyn Kelly, compulsively unable to mind her own business.
Megyn, who now thinks congratulating people on their new job that they are unqualified to perform is patriotic, appears to not be uplifted by the Girl Scouts—which may explain the saltiness of her tweet. The only thing pathetic here is seeing a “congratulations” tweet to a woman so anti-woman that she aligned with a group that called for the criminalization of IVF and refused to commit to an opinion on birth control should be uplifting to anyone at all.