Where Were You During the Great Instagram Catastrophe of 2018?
The week between Christmas and New Year’s Day should ideally be one that gently eases us into the existential horror of…
Report: The White House is Full of Petty Motherfuckers
On Tuesday, it was reported that White House Chief of Staff John Kelly, the bad yet beleaguered man currently in charge…
Is Everything OK at the Trump National Hudson Valley Golf Club??
On Monday, the Trump National Hudson Valley Golf Club’s Twitter account tweeted a picture of a plate of food with a…
Grimesline: A Terrible Relationship for Our Cruel World
One of the greatest gifts of the last few months has been the relationship between critically acclaimed internet…
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez's Democratic Primary Opponent Will Remain on the Ballot Because of Some Bullshit
Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez, the 28-year-old Democratic congressional primary winner who simultaneously rouses feelings of…
Illinois Waited 46 Years to Ratify the Equal Rights Amendment, but What's Four Decades Between Friends
The Illinois House voted on Wednesday to ratify the Equal Rights Amendment, following approval last month in the state…
What the Hell Did I Just Watch? A Rampage Review
Though I am not one, I share a trait with all straight men. That is: there is a place in my heart reserved for Dwayne…
Senate Votes Down First Version of the GOP's Better Care Reconciliation Act
Hours after infirm, irony-resistant Senator John McCain cast a decisive vote in favor of debating destroying health…
Advice Columnist Who Told Teen She Was Lucky Her Rapist Wore a Condom Gives Bullshit Apology
Kelly Chopard writes her “Dear Kelly” advice column for a teen magazine in Singapore called Teenage. In the November…
Christ, Poldark, What Are You Doing?
Well, over in the U.K. Poldark finally reached that episode that had folks worried and let’s just say they didn’t…
Here Are 2 Trailers for 2 Very Different Movies About Operators, Both Named Operator
Last year, a movie called Operator was released. Or perhaps it was just made on a dare and not distributed, as I had…
The Life of Marie Antoinette, According to Stock Photos
There are few names more famous than that of ill-fated French queen Marie Antoinette. Her legacy is so powerful that…
Planned Parenthood Sues Indiana Over Terrible Fetal Burial Anti-Abortion Law
Planned Parenthood has filed suit against Indiana for a new anti-abortion law, arguing that it’s blatantly…
Is Amazon Opening More Brick-and-Mortar Bookstores?
Is it possible that a bookstore clerk once dreadfully wronged Jeff Bezos? Because a rumor that Amazon might open more…
State of Emergency Declared in Flint, MI Due to Toxic Levels of Lead in Water Supply
In Flint, Michigan, the number of children with “above-average” lead in their blood has doubled in the last year. The…
The Ethicist Weighs in On an Insane Real-Life Jane the Virgin Mix-Up
The premise of Jane the Virgin centers around a young woman who becomes pregnant after being artificially inseminated…
Don Lemon Compares Himself to James Baldwin and Malcolm X
One of the ways Don Lemon attempts to justify regularly going on television and embarrassing both himself and the…
Here's a Website That'll Help You Fake a Pregnancy
If you’re running some really elaborate long con that requires you to fake a pregnancy with convincing verisimilitude,…
Woman Pulled Over for Breastfeeding Two-Year-Old While Cruising Down Highway
An unidentified woman has been cited in Everett, Washington after a concerned citizen called 911, terrified that the…