Welcome to Barf Bag, a daily politics roundup to help you sort through the chaotic Trumpian news cycle.

Mike Pence, a cauliflower that was once victimized by the movie Mulan, claimed that he walked out of today’s 49ers-Colts game, because the players supposedly disrespected the troops during the rote nationalistic pre-game ceremony. While the Colts stood arm-in-arm during the anthem, a reported 23 members of the 49ers…

As the meaning of national anthem demonstrations has shifted from a specific protest against racial injustice and police brutality to a vague stand of unity, it seems that now, some NFL fans have been conditioned to boo any time they see a player taking a knee.

White House Press Secretary/bewitched doorknob Sarah Huckabee Sanders on Monday defended Donald Trump’s asinine and racist comments in which he said that any football player who takes a knee during the national anthem to protest police brutality and racism is a “son of a bitch” who should be fired.

“All anybody’s talking about is these NFL protests and that’s...unfortunate,” said Kathie Lee Gifford Monday on the Today show. Oh it it? Tell us more. “I understand that it’s on the minds of a lot of people but there are so many problems in the world.”

Things escalated quickly from some bullshit comments the president made recently, this time it has to do with sports.

President Donald Trump has made something of a hobby out of attacking private citizens, Colin Kaepernick among them. During a rally held in Alabama last night, he referred to Kaepernick (among others), though not by name, saying that NFL owners should, when faced with a player kneeling during the national anthem, “get…

While stumping for Alabama senatorial candidate Luther Strange tonight, prominent dotard Donald Trump urged his friends in NFL ownership to march onto the field and fire players who kneel during the playing of the national anthem. He further claimed that NFL ratings are down because players aren’t allowed to hit each…

An attorney for Aaron Hernandez and his estate announced today that researchers at Boston University found signs of CTE in the brain of the deceased former NFL player.

The full NFL investigative report on star Dallas Cowboys running back Ezekiel Elliott has been released. It was included as an exhibit to a lawsuit, filed in federal court by the NFL Players’ Association, demanding that Elliott’s league-issued suspension be vacated. In its lawsuit, the NFLPA calls what transpired “one…

A player who is expected to go in the first round of Thursday’s NFL draft has been accused of sexual assault, according to Cleveland 19 News. But this is a weird one: The station is not naming the player, despite having a statement from his attorney, because the cops are dragging their feet on filing a police report.

Former Patriots tight end Aaron Hernandez was found dead in his prison cell early Wednesday morning in Shirley, Mass. In a statement, the Massachusetts Department of Correction labeled his death a suicide by hanging.

As usual, we FOIAed the Federal Communications Commission for viewer complaints about the Super Bowl, specifically Lady Gaga’s halftime show. Good news! Only two people were offended enough to write in. Bad news—Here’s one of them:

Tampa Bay Buccaneers quarterback Jameis Winston went to Melrose Elementary in Tampa, Fla., on Wednesday, and what was supposed to be a breezy photo op turned into yet another instance of Winston being a dumb shithead in public.

Yeah yeah, you knew all along. Whatever, I’ll self-own with this post, I’ve already taken nothing but Ls over the last year.

Let me anger bigots around the country by wishing you a very happy holidays.

It is, let me say here, quite weird to project your own beliefs and aspirations onto an octogenarian Supreme Court justice and expect it to never backfire. But woke Twitter folk hero Ruth Bader Ginsburg, center of a highly marketable personality cult, has some gross things to say about Colin Kaepernick’s protest of…

Ahead of their Sunday season opener, the Seattle Seahawks announced plans to link arms during the national anthem as a show of unity for an vague collection of causes, including “brotherhood” and “freedom.”

Ben Roethlisberger, the Pittsburgh Steelers quarterback who’s been accused of sexual assault by two separate women, has weighed in on San Francisco 49ers QB Colin Kaepernick’s controversial decision to sit during the National Anthem as a protest of police brutality.

At this point, America has gotten pretty familiar with Jordan Rodgers, brother of Aaron Rodgers, because despite how much he’s argued he’s far more than just the brother of a famous football player, his edit on the show is certainly not showing up his other skills.