Zayn and Nicki Minaj Can't Handle Liars, and Katy Perry Gifts Us a Cheap Christmas Song

Will pass: Zayn Malik and Nicki Minaj, “No Candle No Light” - Nicki Minaj tends to spread herself thin with collaborations, but there used to be a time when it was worth it. This Zayn track is what would play if you were running through a forest in search of your long-lost love. Notice it has a similar squeaky,…

J. Lo and Bad Bunny Have Incredible Swag Together, and Shawn Mendes Did Something Kinda Good

Y: Jennifer Lopez and Bad Bunny, “Te Guste” – At some point, my hot mom decided it would be cool and cute to collaborate with my boyfriend, and honestly I’m not even mad. Yes, when he says things like “Tu tienes un tesoro debajo del zipper,” aka You have a treasure behind your zipper, I get a little uncomfortable, but…

Cardi B Does a Quirky Freaky Collab With El Alfa, Carly Rae Parties Solo, and Is That D'Angelo?

Si, si, si, si, I’m dyingggg!: El Alfa feat. Cardi B, “Mi Mami” - Acolytes of Dominican dembow, the best music in the entire world (Cardi agrees), are well familiar with El Alfa El Jefe, one of the genre’s most charismatic figures who has for years lent his baby-voiced dirty missives to a string of relatively massive…

John Mayer Bores Us, Jason Derulo Tortures Us, and Lauren Jauregui Does a Solo Ballad

Nope: John Mayer, “I Guess I Just Feel Like” – John Mayer sighs a heavy sigh at his breakfast table, dropping his copy of the New York Times Sunday edition into his lap. His orange juice sits before him. His bowl of Wheaties barely touched. It’s another day of terrible headlines as the global world order begins to…

Empress Of Is Deeply Relatable, Khalid Shines Again, and Third Time's the Charm for Mariah

Y: Empress Of, Us album – Latin American indie artist Lorely Rodriguez is a musical delight, and this new album (as well as the collab below) sets her up for a win. Following her very personal debut album, Me, this sophomore collection is meant to be relatable and somewhat fun, especially in a live setting—though…

Bad Bunny and Drake are Here to Slake Your Thirst and Troye Sivan and Charli XCX Attempt Nostalgia

Y: Bad Bunny ft. Drake, “MIA” – Your Latino lover and Jewish ex dropped a single to quench your thirst. Drake, a rapper that Benito has proudly claimed to stan ever since he was on the come up, is now a ft. (little f) on one of his songs—which bleeds red, white and Bad Bunny. Set in a quintessential Latinx barbacoa in…

Mariah Is 100 Percent Mariah, and Halsey Drops a Forgettable Breakup Anthem

Well, it’s Mariah: Mariah Carey, “With You” - One of the most wonderful things about Mariah is her staunch refusal to be anything but 100 percent herself. Instead of just playing the generic narrator of her otherwise by-the-numbers ballad “With You,” she will have you know that she is Mariah the star: She has her…

Lady Gaga Implores Us to Explore 'The Shallow' and Weezer Should Leave 'Africa' Alone

YES!!! I’M IN THE SHA-HAAAA SHA-HAAA-LOW!: Lady Gaga and Bradley Cooper, “Shallow” The full-length song and video for the record that will rule our lives until the end of time (or at least, till the end of 2018 and throughout awards season) has been released, and this is just the tip of the iceberg of a soundtrack

Avril Lavigne Returns, and Lana Del Rey's 'Venice Bitch' Is the Soundtrack to a Sun-Soaked Drive

A million times yes: Lana Del Rey, “Venice Bitch” - After feeling mostly indifferent toward Lana’s previous single “Mariners Apartment Complex,” I was happy to discover that “Venice Bitch” is more my speed. I knew it from the first verse, when she said she’s “fresh out of fucks forever.” She claims “Venice bitch” as a…

Mariah Carey Can Do Bad All By Herself, Noname Gambles With Love, and New Lana Del Rey

Love it: Mariah Carey “GTFO” (video) - Mariah’s long proven to be the best at delicate cut-downs decked in 10-cent words (here: “You left me lost and disenchanted”; “My prince was so unjustly handsome”). This, which comes with a softly filtered video of Mariah dawdling about the house in lingerie, is one of those…

Ashlee and Evan Ross's 'I Do' Makes Us Say 'I Can't'

I don’t: Ashlee Simpson and Evan Ross, “I Do” - At last (just kidding), the Ross couple released the duet they’ve been teasing to promote their upcoming reality show and it’s um, a song. Judging from the title, and lyrics like “this love came over me like a hurricane,” I’m taking a wild guess that it’s a shot at a…

Summer's Celebrities Are Out in Full Force in Childish Gambino's Video for 'Feels Like Summer'

It’s been a long season for celebrity news—remember when Azealia Banks hid in Elon Musk’s house? When Nicki Minaj blamed Travis Scott for her poor album sales? Drake’s secret baby? Kanye West stanning for Donald Trump? Gang’s all here, albeit in animated form, in Childish Gambino’s new video for “Feels Like Summer,”…

Sia Becomes a Puppet, Human People Will Crush You, and Bad Bunny Proves His influence

Yes: Human People, “Jenny” - If you’re a sucker for power pop-punk that tends to reject the confines of either guitar genre and places melody above all, Brooklyn’s Human People are for you. “Jenny” is their latest, and it’s hard for me to think of a more righteous lyric this year than: “Don’t touch me/I could crush…

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