You will forgive* this adorable little girl for letting a cow into her house without telling her mom.

Rudi Rok is a voice actor and internet personality who can mimic animal noises really well. So well, that he tricks animals. He's like the David Blaine of furry things. While given the hubbub about the 29 impersonations dude being a fake, I feel like I must exercise an even more intense degree of caution/everything…

Beef steaks? Sure! Beef tongue? Pushing it. Improperly labeled, un-inspected beef penis not intended for human consumption? NO THANKS. And yet, according to a lawsuit, that's exactly what a Texas supermarket repackaged and sold as just another variety of on-the-up-and-up people food.

In another edition of PETA Is The Worst, parents in Woodland Hills, California allege that the organization handed out pamphlets to their children at school containing graphic pictures of mutilated cows. The children were traumatized by these pamphlets on the same day that a baby cow was on campus as part of a lesson…

I haven't learned much in my 31 years on this planet, but boy have I learned this: Fart news is never good news.

Farm Sanctuary is probably my favorite place on Earth. It's where animals rescued from shit situations like factory farms and hoarders get to live out their lives with a bunch of hippies who love them. Plus, they usually have vegan cake just sitting everywhere. Heaven.

Cereal is awesome, isn't it? Well, except for all that chewing and sogginess, cereal is pretty awesome, but, jeez, doesn't your jaw get tired from masticating all those corn shavings and marshmallow bits? It'd be way better if you could just get that cloying cereal taste without all the effort, if cereal just slid…

Depending on your perspective, the most recent drought has wrought some pretty interesting stuff. For instance, did you know that now, because corn prices are so high, feed rations for beef and dairy cows have consequently become prohibitively expensive? And, as a result, a lot of U.S. cattlemen have been…

Yesterday, the Duke and Duchess of Cambridge hit Calgary on their tour of Canada, where they donned cowboy hats and had a knee-slappin' good time.

Researchers at China Agricultural University have done something truly disgusting: They've introduced human genes into test tube cows so that they can produce a "human-like milk." The lead researcher, professor Ning Li told the Sunday Telegraph, "The milk tastes stronger than normal milk." Mmm, test tube milk that's…

[Australia, February 21: A cow and it's handler pose for surrealist artist Andrew Baines at Abby Beach in Busselton, Australia. Baines worked with South West Dairy Farmers to prepare the cows to stand in the ocean for up to ten minutes to complete his installation. Please note: Chickens don't live in the sea, and…

[Germany, September 10: Women wearing Bavarian dirndl dresses walk with a decorated cow in Oberstaufen, Germany. The alpine farmers decorate one cow of the herd when all the cows return well from the mountains. Image via Getty.]

Top women's leaders will call for the resignation of Alan Simpson, the Republican co-chair of Obama's deficit commission, for calling Social Security "a milk cow with 310 million tits" to the director of National Older Woman's League. He has apologized.

[Sydney, April 1. Image via Getty]

[Paris, March 4. Image via Getty]

• Headline of the day: "Tenn. Man Says Neighbor's Cows Licked $100 In Damage To His House; Home's Tastiness A Mystery." Also, according to the article, his insurance won't cover the damage because it was an "act of cow." •

[Bad Hindelang, Germany; September 11. Image via Getty]