Behold, one of the most depressing sentences you'll read today, courtesy of the AP: "A new study finds that much of a child's 'weight fate' is set by age 5." Quick! Put Big Bird and Paddington Bear on a diet! March your toddler down to Planet Fitness! Ban cupcakes!

Childhood obesity is a socioeconomic issue. According to a new study, Harvard University researchers found that children with better educated parents are less likely to become overweight because they are more active. On the other hand, in the shadows of First Lady Michelle Obama's "Let's Move" campaign to fight…

A local busybody in Fargo, North Dakota has decided to take America's child obesity epidemic on herself this Halloween by only giving candy to the trick or treaters she deems thin enough to deserve candy. The rest of the kids — those the woman deems "moderately obese" — get notes telling their parents to stop having…

Somehow we missed this but the video for "Everybody" — a track featuring Doug E. Fresh that will appear on Michelle Obama's hip hop album, which is a real thing that exists — features Dr. Oz rapping. While wearing scrubs and a stethoscope.

Good news for everybody out there who hates the white water: skim and low-fat milks aren't as awesome for weight-loss as we were once told, according to new research.

Last year, in a piece for Vogue magazine, Dara-Lynn Weiss wrote about putting her 7-year-old daughter (pseudonym: Bea) on a diet, and how hard that was. For Weiss:

The Biggest Loser, NBC's cash cow "reality" hit that teaches grown-ass men and women to hate the fat away, is now allowing teens on the show. I think their new tagline is, "Because adults shouldn't be the only one running on treadmills until they puke." There's no better way to get children on the fast track to eating…

Want to hear something depressing? According to teachers' estimates, two-thirds of students in some public schools rely on school lunch as their primary source of caloric intake. Want to hear something else depressing (YES!) According to government data, between 16 and 33% of American children and teens are obese.…

The Biggest Loser returns in January, and this time around, the program is "going after" childhood obesity. Trainer Jillian Michaels left the show in May 2011, but she's coming back to tackle overweight kids. Usually, The Biggest Loser is a weight-loss competition, with participants partially disrobing stepping on a…

The statistics tell us that one in six U.S. children are obese, and one in three are overweight. And when you look at an obesity map alongside a poverty map, you get the sense that the two are related. A new study in the May issue of the journal Pediatrics finds facts that support this theory.

A Walt Disney World exhibit on childhood obesity has been closed prematurely after fat acceptance groups pointed out that way the exhibit depicts fat people is totally hateful and fucked up. Disney claims it was just trying to encourage kids to be healthier. Those against the childhood obesity exhibit say that it…

Today in studies that would've made my eighth-grade self feel vindicated, we learn that kids who feel ostracized when playing games are less likely to exercise. And unsurprisingly, there are way better ways to get kids moving than shaming them.

Recently, we learned that junk food in schools may not have much effect on kids' weight. But another study shows that school anti-obesity programs could have some unintended consequences, possibly triggering kids' eating disorders.

Last year, the state of Georgia started running "Stop Child Obesity" ads featuring real-live kids employed as child actors. But, of course, the part the kids are playing — that of an overweight child — mirrors reality. Chloe McSwain, one of the kids on billboards and in commercials, has fantastic self-esteem: "I'm…

Congress has taken on a long-neglected injustice in the food pyramid and will push to ensure that pizza, once derided as little more than a triangular delivery system for sodium and saturated fats, be finally recognized as the wholesome vegetable that it is. Our tax dollars, God's work.

Spurred by concern over childhood obesity, for the first time in 15 years the federal government has proposed changes to the school-lunch program that would make cafeteria food less gruel-like. As evidenced by their notorious love of kissing babies, politicians are extremely concerned about the well-being of American…

Schools used to dish out putrid pasta dishes, burned french fries, and mystery meats with few complaints from parents, but the childhood obesity epidemic has drawn more attention to what kids are being served at school. For years advocates have been saying children need to have healthier lunch options, but now one…