Sound of Music, Live! Teaser Will Not Be Your New Favorite Thing

Much like the Nazis’ invasion of Salzburg, Sound of Music, Live! is coming whether we like it or not. Here’s a teaser for the live television event that will air December 5th on NBC.

On the plus side, it features Broadway heavyweights Laura Benanti, Audra McDonald and Christian Borle! On the downside, literally everything else. Not only is Carrie Underwood playing Maria (how do we solve a problem like this?), but fucking VAMPIRE BILL (Stephen Moyer) is playing Captain Von Trapp. Sure, he can run around naked and covered in blood for HBO, but what are the chances he can smolder like Christopher Plummer?

On one hand, this adaptation is based on the original Sound of Music musical and not the 1965 film version so it’s not really fair to compare them. On the other hand, shut up, fairness. Leave my childhood favorites alone.