The UK drug-fighting non-profit known as Crimestoppers is sending scratch n sniff pot cards to entire neighborhoods — warning the recipient that if they encounter that particular smell, they need call the Beefeaters poste haste figgy pudding! Or, you know, go over with some snacks, and have a cool party.

Crimestoppers also warns that smell alone does not a drug den of iniquity make — some other clues that there's a terrifying weed farm next door might include always shuttered blinds, radiating heat, and a steady stream of miscreants coming and going. Uh, if that's any indication, my heat-blasting, hermit ass (who enjoys a constant supply of delivery food!) should be hauled off and questioned ASAP. Thanks for nothing, Crimestoppers!