Saturday Night Social: This Cabbage Is the Stuff of Nightmares

Illustration for article titled Saturday Night Social: This Cabbage Is the Stuff of Nightmares
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It’s all fun and horticulture until your alien cabbage eats your dentist.

Rosemary Norwood and her husband, Sean Cadman, began growing what they understandably believed would grow into an average-sized cabbage. The whole thing very quickly turned into a “Feed me, Seymour” situation, and they ended up a cabbage that looked thirsty for human blood. Perhaps I’m just overly suspicious of any larger-than-average flora due to a fondness for Rick Moranis, but tell me this leafy green doesn’t look at all sinister:

Fortunately for all of us, the Tasmania, Australia couple has managed to kill the man-sized cabbage, feasting upon its carcass for a full three weeks.

Did this week mark your own metaphorical triumph over a prodigious vegetable?    

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This week I relied on my CBD oil/vape instead of other relaxation methods for my extreme anxiety. I’m so goddamned not bothered and it’s so freeing. I love not feeling like I need to tuck into a margarita to relax at night. I also got a new puppy and need help with his name. He’s a flashy fawn Boxer dog and is about three weeks old. Help! Everyone hates my names (it’s really Mr.TARDIS’ dog but he’s shit at names).